in which I get rambly again

First off, anyone who watches The Vampire Diaries, go read this epic post of epicness by ineffort (I'm so proud to call you my friend! *sob*) who doesn't write meta often but totally SHOULD. Her thoughts about Stefan and Katherine (and, peripherally, Damon and a tad bit of Elena) are GENIUS and make me flail with love for this show. WITH BONUS PICSPAMS AND MIX. GET ON THAT.

Once you've done that, you can read the rest of this!

So if you've been around here for very long, you know that I identify with Spike. Like, a lot. A lot a lot. He's the character on BtVS I always understand, whose point of view I never struggle with. Even when I (violently, sometimes) disagree with the conclusions he arrives at or the choices he makes, I always understand where he's coming from. Because he's just so hungry, so ravenous. He feels so much and wants so much and he can't disguise that. It's all right there. I am the same way. I once made some people on my flist laugh by saying that I spew emotion everywhere, but uh. I do. I can be extremely effusive and demonstrative when I'm really close to people (though very shy and stand-off-ish around people I'm not as close to) and I am unafraid of commitment and talking about any feeling that I might have.

Also if you've been around, you know I've become the world's (second) biggest fan of Buffy Summers. And you know that it was a long journey to that place. Because she's pretty much the opposite of who I am. The first time I really identified with her was when Dawn came along and she was all I MUST PROTECT MY SISTER. (I have a big sister complex, basically.) So getting into her headspace is pretty much a constant process for me. But a rewarding one, because it's always really good to look at things from very different povs, you know?

Anyways! Because it was such a struggle for me to grow to understand Buffy, it's always nice when someone who identifies more with her offers their insight.

If I am Spike, then ohwaluvusbab is Buffy. Which I guess means that we should have a crazy love/hate relationship involving banter and UST and redemption arcs? Okay, we'll get right on that. And she shared something with me in the comments to my last BtVS-related post (which I swear I'm going to answer replies to sooner or later) that was so insightful and true that I wanted to share it:

Full disclosure: I am a Buffy. Completely. I feel so connected with her because pretty much the way she functions, lS THE WAY I FUNCTION. (If this is cause for criticism from certain people, fine. Whatever. Come at me.) And this is why I can tell you with 100% certainty that in S7, Buffy loved Spike. It is not even in question.

...

I think part of the issue is that people are judging Buffy-in-love by the way she was with Angel.

You are 100% right about this. I'll go further. I'd say people judge Buffy-in-love by THEIR own idea of what love is supposed to look like. I see some people say that Buffy's not capable of love by S7, which... I can understand why they think this. But on bad days, I find this sentiment pretty damn insulting. To me, it's akin to saying, "YOUR love is inadequate, because it doesn't meet certain requirements us emotionally healthy people have ordained." (Which, hey, possibly over-identifying here. I'll be the first to admit I'm not well-adjusted. I feel such compassion for Buffy in S7 because I've also doubted at length about my own ability to love. Over-sharing. Whatever.) Just. Fuck. Fuck this ~conventional, acceptable way~ of relationships. Buffy called it love. WHY IS THAT NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

And I was all, "Brb, shaking and crying." Because YES. ( cut for rambling about Riley, introversion, mental health, and the definition of love, among other things )

in which I get rambly again

First off, anyone who watches The Vampire Diaries, go read this epic post of epicness by ineffort (I'm so proud to call you my friend! *sob*) who doesn't write meta often but totally SHOULD. Her thoughts about Stefan and Katherine (and, peripherally, Damon and a tad bit of Elena) are GENIUS and make me flail with love for this show. WITH BONUS PICSPAMS AND MIX. GET ON THAT.

Once you've done that, you can read the rest of this!

So if you've been around here for very long, you know that I identify with Spike. Like, a lot. A lot a lot. He's the character on BtVS I always understand, whose point of view I never struggle with. Even when I (violently, sometimes) disagree with the conclusions he arrives at or the choices he makes, I always understand where he's coming from. Because he's just so hungry, so ravenous. He feels so much and wants so much and he can't disguise that. It's all right there. I am the same way. I once made some people on my flist laugh by saying that I spew emotion everywhere, but uh. I do. I can be extremely effusive and demonstrative when I'm really close to people (though very shy and stand-off-ish around people I'm not as close to) and I am unafraid of commitment and talking about any feeling that I might have.

Also if you've been around, you know I've become the world's (second) biggest fan of Buffy Summers. And you know that it was a long journey to that place. Because she's pretty much the opposite of who I am. The first time I really identified with her was when Dawn came along and she was all I MUST PROTECT MY SISTER. (I have a big sister complex, basically.) So getting into her headspace is pretty much a constant process for me. But a rewarding one, because it's always really good to look at things from very different povs, you know?

Anyways! Because it was such a struggle for me to grow to understand Buffy, it's always nice when someone who identifies more with her offers their insight.

If I am Spike, then ohwaluvusbab is Buffy. Which I guess means that we should have a crazy love/hate relationship involving banter and UST and redemption arcs? Okay, we'll get right on that. And she shared something with me in the comments to my last BtVS-related post (which I swear I'm going to answer replies to sooner or later) that was so insightful and true that I wanted to share it:

Full disclosure: I am a Buffy. Completely. I feel so connected with her because pretty much the way she functions, lS THE WAY I FUNCTION. (If this is cause for criticism from certain people, fine. Whatever. Come at me.) And this is why I can tell you with 100% certainty that in S7, Buffy loved Spike. It is not even in question.

...

I think part of the issue is that people are judging Buffy-in-love by the way she was with Angel.

You are 100% right about this. I'll go further. I'd say people judge Buffy-in-love by THEIR own idea of what love is supposed to look like. I see some people say that Buffy's not capable of love by S7, which... I can understand why they think this. But on bad days, I find this sentiment pretty damn insulting. To me, it's akin to saying, "YOUR love is inadequate, because it doesn't meet certain requirements us emotionally healthy people have ordained." (Which, hey, possibly over-identifying here. I'll be the first to admit I'm not well-adjusted. I feel such compassion for Buffy in S7 because I've also doubted at length about my own ability to love. Over-sharing. Whatever.) Just. Fuck. Fuck this ~conventional, acceptable way~ of relationships. Buffy called it love. WHY IS THAT NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

And I was all, "Brb, shaking and crying." Because YES. ( cut for rambling about Riley, introversion, mental health, and the definition of love, among other things )

the book we were talking about...

For deird1, snickfic, ladyofthelog and anyone else who is interested:

The name of the book is Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture by Adam S. McHugh. I've added it to my list.

His website is here. I haven't had a chance to look at it yet, but it looks interesting.

the book we were talking about...

For deird1, snickfic, ladyofthelog and anyone else who is interested:

The name of the book is Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture by Adam S. McHugh. I've added it to my list.

His website is here. I haven't had a chance to look at it yet, but it looks interesting.