lirazel | so people are making 'this is what's up with me' posts so i thought i'd make one too?

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so people are making 'this is what's up with me' posts so i thought i'd make one too?

as usual, nothing all that exciting since Vienna, but we'll do it anyway (and I will endeavor to use capitals because this is not tumblr):

+ INFINITE CONCERT PENDING. OMG. It seems Jamie will not get to go with me (I can't talk about this because DESPAIR), so I'm thinking of the DC one? I just need to find someone to go with, to room with/sit with/sing-along-on-the-top-of-my-lungs with. Warning: if Woohyun and/or Dongwoo start crying, I will probably cry my eyes out too. So. You've been warned.

+ In case I haven’t talked to you since then, the Vienna trip was great. Nearly perfect except for the heat which was EXTREME and Europeans don’t know how to use air conditioning (they say they have it, but it doesn’t ever seem like they actually use it!) and also you can’t get a big glass of cold tap water anywhere + there are almost no water fountains anywhere so it was a very thirsty trip. But we had a great time, everything went smoothly, I was the tour guide and arranged EVERYTHING (which was partly stressful but also kind of awesome?) and the parents loved it, so I’m very happy.

+ The little sister is in Ecuador. For almost a year. I am living alone. I LOVE living alone (even though it enables my anti-social behavior in ways that probably aren't healthy), but I miss her a lot.

+ Working on a new novel. AGAIN. Because, no, I am not physically capable of just sticking to one. But I feel really good about this one? ~~Let’s ignore that that’s often the case when I start a new one.~~ I literally had a dream about it and woke up with it fully-formed in my head. Often when I dream, I find myself thinking, “This would be a great book,” but then I wake up and realize the dream made no sense. But this one actually did! ~~Also in the dream the love interest was Sunggyu. I kid you not.~~

It’s set in a fantasy version of like…late 18th century/early 19th century Madagascar? And you would not believe how hard it is to get ahold of a book on Malagasy history. Our library is fantastic, but the only history books they have are either A) for children or B) natural history. I get that the place has all sorts of flora and fauna found nowhere else on earth and that’s awesome BUT WHAT ABOUT THE PEOPLE?

Anyway. I’m really trying to work on it. I want to make it work. I do.

+ So fic is going on hold for a bit. I have signed up for an OT3 bigbang and also for Infinite’s secret santa (and I will for Yuletide), but honestly I think it’s time to put fic on the back burner for just a bit until I get some actual work done on the novel. It’s time for discipline.

+ I did a remix fic for kpop-ficmix and I AM SO HAPPY WITH IT. I can’t wait till it’s posted and writers are revealed and I can tell you about it.

+ The job keeps requiring people to work mandatory overtime, and I am SO GLAD I took the time to fill out my FMLA paperwork so I don’t have to do it too. The company just all-around sucks with the way it treats employees, and yet I can’t bring myself to find something else because I can’t find anything else I’m actually interested in or a place that lets me spend as much time writing/interneting as this one does.

+ On Saturday I had my mama come over and we did some serious overhaul cleaning. Like, went through all the clothes I had and I took like five garbage bags full to goodwill. Which sounds ridiculous and like I have massive amounts of clothes, but honestly I still had some stuff from high school. High school. It was just a matter of actually removing them from my home.

Also went through closets and things and organized. Still have some to do, but I'm feeling good about it. I have a tendency to drive everyone around me crazy with my clutter because I live so totally in my head that it doesn't bother me but it bothers everyone else. But getting rid of stuff feels good.

+ I really need to stop reading about polygamist Mormon cults, but y'all, I can't stop. At this point, I feel like I know more about the Fundamentalist Latter Day Saints than any person should know. BUT I CAN'T STOP READING.

+ Also reading The Family by Jeff Sharlet and it keeps plunging me into despair re: fundamentalist Christians. Since I'm also a Christian I feel like it is my job to battle the fundamentalist ones but that is a lot for one person to take on. I need some perspective.

+ I haven't been good at actually watching things lately? Slooooowly watching I Hear Your Voice and weeping over Lee Jung Suk's everything. It's so good. But I only manage one episode every few days. I need to finish You're the Best Lee Soon Shin and watch the last episode of Monstar and start Master's Sun, but for some reason my attention span when it comes to TV is very short right now.

+ And I was thinking about kdramas and how they seem bent on giving me a schoolboy kink. Oh, let's put Sung Joon and Myungsoo in school uniforms. Let's put Lee Jung Suk and Kim Woo Bin in school uniforms. Let's put Seo In Guk and Hoya in school uniforms. WHAT NEXT? I am trying not to be a dirty old lady, but kdramas are making it really hard.

+ I...do not really go to church anymore because it's just too hard for me to go and yet never actually talk to anyone. I know I should, but I don't. However, I read progressive theology blogs like ALL THE TIME. I have zero interest in ever going into ministry, but man, I would love to go to seminary just so I could geek out about theology. Nothing more fun.

+ Oh, and I’ve been thinking and I want some advice.

I have never been able to find any kind of exercise/physical exertion that I actually enjoy. Every sport is loathsome to me both because I hate competition and because I am hopelessly clumsy and have no athletic ability. “Working out” seems like such a waste of time to me (I know it isn’t, but that’s what it feels like) and I can’t bring myself to pay to go somewhere. So I’ve been walking. Some. When it’s not too hot. But even that I don’t really like. (I do love taking nice leisurely walks or walks/hikes in places with beautiful views, but the former isn’t really good exercise and the latter isn’t really accessible).

The only thing movement-wise (I am so sedentary, it’s pathetic) that has ever appealed to me is dancing. And I grew up in a denomination that had a long-standing ban (unofficial, because nothing’s official in that denomination since there’s no central governing body) on dancing (also drinking, etc). By my generation, nobody much cares about that ban and it’s melted away, but the residual effects of it are that I grew up in a world devoid of dancing in real life (though I also grew up in a world saturated with movie musicals, so). No dancing even at weddings. (Part of this is because in the South--at least in the evangelical subculture, which is a significant part of the region--nobody used to have real receptions unless you were rich. Receptions have always been: cake, maybe some other desserts, everyone stands around and talks, then you send the bride and groom away with rice/bubbles/sparklers/whatever's the trend right now. No sit-down dinner, no drinking, no dancing. This is shifting quickly and is no longer the case, but I was literally in my twenties before I ever went to a wedding with a dinner, drinking or dancing. And the wedding was of a college friend from outside the South, so that explains it.)

ANYWAY. (I always overexplain things, it’s one of my worst habits.) I have always been really fascinated by dancing (all those musicals! Fred Astaire! Gene Kelly! West Side Story! Also: figure skating!), but have zero experience with it in any form.

But now I kind of want to do it. That’s how I want to get my exercise. And I want to do, like, kpop dancing. Which I guess is hiphop? I don’t know. There isn’t a dancing school to teach you how to do the “America” dance from West Side Story, so this is my second choice.

BUT. I am a very, very slow learner when it comes to anything kinesthetic. In school when we had to do like line dancing and folk dancing and stuff, it always took me twice as long to learn the steps than anyone else. And once I know them, I can do them, but I lag so far behind everyone that it was always miserable. So I don’t want to take a group class. I want to do private lessons. I think it’s the only way to do it.

But I’m having trouble A) finding someone to teach private lessons (they’d have to provide the space, too, since I don’t have any, as my duplex is TINY) and B) figuring out the expense thing. I mean, private lessons would have to be hella expensive, right? I’m okay money-wise (since I have no debt and I’m only supporting myself; my income would be painful if it weren’t for those two things), but I don’t know that I have enough? And I don’t know how to find someone I’d feel comfortable with? I want to work with a lady (a gay guy would be okay too, I guess, but it’s kind of rude to ask, “Are you gay?” to someone you don’t know. I would not feel comfortable alone with a guy who’s attracted to women) and someone who I get along with who knows what she’s doing and won’t think I’m embarrassingly terrible. But I just don’t know how to go about making it happen.

Does anybody have any suggestions? I don’t even know what suggestions I’m looking for, but I feel like I need some backup on this. This is like a huge thing for me. I’m a very self-conscious person, especially about anything involving my body (not in how it looks, necessarily, but in using it/moving it) and I know I’m going to be AWFUL at it at first, so the whole thing makes me feel all knotted up inside when I think about it, even though I really want to do it.

Gah. For someone who leads an incredibly quiet life, this got long. Kudos to you if you managed to make it through that, and I totally understand if you didn't!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

(I'm not following the same order as in your post because I'm writing as I remember my thoughts HAHA).

I just finished The Best Lee Soon Shin! I've got... mixed feelings about the whole thing, but Soon Shin and Junho are one of my favorite kdrama couples ever from now on and now I'm back to watching What's up. I loved that drama when I started it (I watched 10 episodes in 3 days) but then I stopped for no reason (I think I made a trip or sth and never went back to it after that) and Jo Jung Suk is in it and yayayay. Also, the song Jung Suk sings for Lee Soon Shin's OST is now #3 in my most played songs. I REGRET NOTHING.

Dancing! I wanna try dancing this year too, but I don't know if I'll have the time + also a really really slow learner when it comes to physical things. It sucks. I think since one class is included in what I pay for my uni's gym and swimming pool, I'll try it and see how it goes. Dunno what type of dancing I'll do: I like hip hop but also funky-ish dancing (one of my bffs does that) but idk. Probs hip hop too, I think it also fits me better? I have no suggestions for you, sorry :/ but yay, I'm glad you're gonna try. Hope you tell us how it goes if you end up doing it for real :D

I think we Europeans don't use the air conditioning as often because 1) we're very used to this kind of heat and 2) it's expensive. Like, literally, I grew up in the South with NO air conditioning because it wasn't really a normal thing to have among middle class people there, so I can handle very high temperatures with no AC, which is GOOD because at least here AC is FUCKING EXPENSIVE, lmao. That's why here in Spain we try to use as little as we can. It also gives us an excuse to complain a lot, which we love to do, heh.

OMG GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR NOVEL :D One day you're gonna publish something and I'm gonna make you sign my copy of your book, I hope you know that :') I hope you make it work!

:( I still don't know if I'll go to Infinite's. Hope you enjoy it! ^_^

♥

I also have mixed feelings about the show (kdrama writers need editors SO BADLY), but I loved the sisters and their love interests (BREAD MAN!) and yes, Soon Shin and Junho are SO LOVELY. I have been in love with Jo Jung Suk for a long time now, and now I'm even more in love with him!

I think since one class is included in what I pay for my uni's gym and swimming pool, I'll try it and see how it goes.

That sounds like a great idea! Gives you some time to figure out if it's right for you!

Well, in Vienna they were setting all-time high records for that week! So it was extreme even for them! I actually typically love heat—I can handle any hot temperature so long as it’s not too humid (though where I live it’s always too humid, but I put up with it)—but it was really rough because there also wasn’t any access to cold water. If you want cold water you have to buy bottles of it, and that’s expensive and totally pointless when you can just get a glass of tap water with ice EXCEPT EUROPEANS DON’T USE ICE EITHER AND ALSO THE GLASSES ARE BARELY BIGGER THAN SHOT GLASSES. Seriously, if we’d been able to get cold water (or even water fountains!) all the places we went, I would have had 3000% less to complain about re: heat. But the combination of no water + no air conditioning was too much for me. I needed one or the other!

I totally understand not having air conditioning at all (though everyone here does). I just find it funny that places have air conditioning but they barely turn it on? Like, if everyone's going to still be sweating while sitting inside, what's the point of having it at all?

Thank you thank you! I really appreciate your good wishes!

Edited 2013-09-03 15:12 (UTC)

BREAD MAN IS THE MOST ADORABLE THING EVER, OH MY GOD. Chan Woo was a bit boring for my taste, but cute nonetheless. I just like some more humour or dorkiness in my boys, haha. The sisters and I had a difficult relationship, though :/ Yooshin annoyed me so much sometimes, and I spent much of the drama waiting for Hye Shin to be something more than the audience of the family's lives. But they were really loveable, which is more than I can say for Granny, so I loved them so so so much. The little kid that plays Woo Joo kicks ass too! But I'll shut up now cause I don't know where you're atm xDDD

Oh, but idt that's an European thing, actually. Must be an Austrian/maybe most of the North of Europe thing, lmao. We do use ice and glasses are pretty big here for instance HAHA.

what's the point of having it at all?

The thing is... what's expensive it's not buying it or installing it; it's using it. Electricity bills can SKYROCKET. So usually in locals, it depends on how well their €€€ are coming in. Before the crisis, AC was everywhere in Spain because of obvious reasons; now, most places won't turn it on unless it's like 35 ºC or more here where I live. IT SUCKS, though, I'm totally with you on there :( I really hate hot weather (despite having grown up in it; or maybe because of that, idk) and most of the time, with hot weather, I'd rather stay home than go to cafes etc with friends, lmao.

I LOVE BREAD MAN SO MUCH. He's such a sweet giant doof!

Chan Woo was a bit boring for my taste, but cute nonetheless.

I completely agree.

Yooshin annoyed me so much sometimes, and I spent much of the drama waiting for Hye Shin to be something more than the audience of the family's lives. But they were really loveable, which is more than I can say for Granny, so I loved them so so so much. The little kid that plays Woo Joo kicks ass too!

Yes, yes, to everything! GRANNY I HATE YOU!!!!!! (I think I have about six episodes left? I don't quite remember.)

We do use ice and glasses are pretty big here for instance HAHA.

Bless you! They just don't in Austria and the area around there. I seem to remember them not doing it in France, either. It drove me crazy. The only time they give you ice is if you order alcohol that involves ice.

what's expensive it's not buying it or installing it; it's using it. Electricity bills can SKYROCKET. So usually in locals, it depends on how well their €€€ are coming in. Before the crisis, AC was everywhere in Spain because of obvious reasons; now, most places won't turn it on unless it's like 35 ºC or more here where I live. I

Aha. That makes a lot of sense! I don't think Austria's been as impacted by the crisis, so I wonder if they are the same way or if they rarely use it at all? I don't remember when I was there before, but it was a tiny bit later in the year, so that could explain it.

I wish you could have seen my face when I read about the 'no dancing' thing I ALMOST BURST INTO TEARS AND MY CHEST STILL HURTS I CANNOT EVEN IMAGINE
I AM NOT GONNA MAKE FOOTLOOSE JOKES BECAUSE YOU'VE PROBABLY HEARD THEM ALL ALREADY!

Oh, I wish I lived close because I would help you and teach you to dance in a heartbeat!

Haha! Well, there weren't any actual laws or anything against it, it just wasn't part of our culture. I am very glad you didn't grow up in such a place omg!

I would totally make you teach me to dance. It would be the greatest!

GIRL YES.

*re: West Side Story, you'd be surprised! I've been to a couple of studios that specifically offered musical theater dancing. It's probably not something you'd want to try unless/until you get more okay with the idea of classes, but it might be an option some day.

*I don't know where you'd go about finding a private teacher, I've never done that. Maybe the place to start would be smaller gyms or yoga studios? If they do personal training then they have the space for one-on-one time, and trainers start out with all kinds of specialties, there are probably a couple of dancers in there somewhere.

*My first impulse was to tell you to check out a couple of videos at home in the meantime, while you're getting used to the very basics of moving around for pleasure. They're meant to be done in your home, so you shouldn't need a whole lot of space. I would stay away from anything geared as a cardio workout, since (a) they go too fast for actual learning and (b) they tend to be EXTREMELY body-negative in a way I wouldn't want anyone exposed to, frankly.

Thinking about it, though, belly dancing might be the place to start? It can be done slowly, and because it tends to emphasize isolated movements, it'll help you get comfortable with basic steps. It's also one of the types of dance that's a pretty good core workout even with the things you'd do just starting out. I wouldn't recommend going into a class straight away, because I can see how that'd eat up one's social anxiety spoons, but there's some resources online. (I haven't had a chance to check this one out but it's not attached to any sketchy marketing or body-shaming, as far as I can tell.)

I will think and come back! I am very pro-dancing. This is awesome, I hope you find something that works for you.

You're fantastic, thanks so much for the thoughts! I do have a tendency to kind of dance around my house when I'm alone, but obviously I have no idea what I'm doing, so checking out a video or something at home might be a good first step. Thank you so much!

Long time ghost reader... I don't even use LJ except to stalk my favorite authors. ^_^ I think this is the first time I've ever commented on anyone's LJ, hehe!!

I'm going to try to go to the NYC concert instead, even though I'm from FL and DC is closer, but I'm very familiar with the NYC already. ^^ So, even though I may not be able to meet you, I will find it awesome that will be at the concerts together "in spirit"!!

Thank you for all your hard work in writing!! <3

Hello! Welcome to lj commenting!

Oh, I hope you have fun at the concert! I'm so excited so many international inspirits are getting to go! We're gonna have so much fun!

You're so welcome and you're so kind to say that! Thank you!!!

Haha, oh god, air conditioning, i had no idea that they exist in other places than a car until two or three years ago! And even if you have them (see: my workplace) most of the time they do not work. 50% of this years summer i had to work with a broken air conditioning. We had some electronics technician coming the other day and they said they would fix it but nothing ever happened. Even the one of the mall does somehow not work properly. In the summer it's always too hot and in the winter it's horribly airless. It's so annoying! The worst definitely happened to the book store next to us: Their air con did not work for the WHOLE SUMMER. And this years summer was short but SO intense. OH AND DO NOT GET ME STARTED ABOUT AIR CONDITIONING IN BUSSES OR TRAINS! There were a few incidents about air cons in ICEs that broke and passagers passed out because of the heat. Also the busses here do not have air con ~~(or at least i never drove with one who had it (but i take the bus a lot so i think they don't have it))~~ and what's even more ridiculous: Sometimes even the windows are locked! And the busses to Uni are so full and it's always sticky and horrible and i hate summer in Germany. I find it extremely hard to stay cool in my summer.

Btw i loved reading those! I love reading your thoughts and i always love it when you write about your culture and how you grew up. I once had a lecture at Uni called 'Moonlight and Magnolias: Literatures of the American South', sadly i could only be present for the first two sessions because of a other lecture but i found it very interesting. My lecturer is actually from Austria and in the first session she talked a bit about the accent and Gone with the Wind and why it's called 'Moonlight and Magnolias' and the second one was by a guest lecturer who told us a bit about the term 'rednecks' and the music of the South. I still have all the handouts and power points of the course.

AND about the dancing and sports: I have the same problem. I danced 'Gardetanze' (there is no english term for it sadly) as a child and some Jazz-dance when i was a teenager and played Volleyball (a GREAT sport! SO FUN!). Now i'd love to dance again but i don't have the time and need to stay flexible for my job. What i do is: I dance to videos. Youtube is great. And i teach myself K-POP dances, sometimes i dance with my sister (when she feels 'uncool' enough omg)I actually bought a mirror just for the dancing so that i can watch my movements. I also had several people recommanding me her: https://www.youtube.com/user/blogilates?feature=g-subs-u

~~(Oh yes, and hi! If you don't know it's me Kris! I created the account a few weeks ago because i wanted to comment un-anon on Hye Mi's Hosoo fic aaand because it want to write more fic comments.)~~

Dude, USAmericans would RIOT if there wasn't air conditioning everywhere. I mean, the really poverty-stricken don't always have it, especially if they're old (and every summer you'll hear of a few local old people dying of the heat, which is heartbreaking), but in general we're ADDICTED to it. Like we love it more than we love our cars, and we LOVE OUR CARS. (Well, except for me. I'd rather have good public transit any day, but I am very rare.)

I can only imagine how hot you get! Actually, I probably do know because that's how I was all week in Vienna! You have all my sympathies!

I love Southern studies. Like, if I went back to grad school, one of the things I'd seriously consider is going down to Ole Miss and studying at the Center for the Study of Southern Culture. It's badass.

Gardetanze looks somewhat similar to Irish step dancing, which we have a lot of in the States (maybe not in the steps and everything, but in the rows of dancers and the folk fashion). It looks cool!

Volleyball is really cool. If I could do it decently it's one I think I might actually like, but my lack of athletic ability gets in the way.

Oh, awesome, thank you for the dancing recs! I think I'm going to try to start doing it immediately at home while I look for a teacher. (I love the idea of my friends around the world dancing to kpop, as apparently a lot of them do. It makes me happy.)

(Hi hi hi!)

hello! i am not really here anymore but hi how are you? :3

look a thing relevant to both our interests:

that is the biggest grin i have ever seen. :*

I am quite fine, I hope you're well too!

And YES THAT MOMENT MADE ME SQUEAL. HE'S SO HAPPY AND BEAUTIFUL AND EMBARRASSED. She made his whole entire life! He's been crushing on her for years and years, and to get her attention (even if it was just for a show) must have made him so happy!

I don't have any advice, sorry. But I wish we lived in the same town because I am hopeless at dancing and hopeless at learning kinesthetic things and would totally love to do a dance class for uncoordinated people with you. I am lucky though, because here we have something called 'Dance Dance Party Party," which is for women only, inclusive of all body types and abilities, and involves just dancing to random playlists that people have made in whatever fashion you like. You're not even supposed to really interact much, so people who are self-conscious don't have to feel like anyone's watching them. I've only been once, but it's totally amazing.

I guess my only recommendation is to watch YouTube tutorials? And also maybe just have solo living room dance parties because you are lucky enough to live at home. I usually save my solo living room dance parties for when my boyfriend is out. Which happens very rarely, since he's super-introverted and works from home.

Someone should start a dance class for uncoordinated people, seriously. I have a feeling they'd make loads of money.

Aw, that sounds like fun! I love the inclusive nature of something like that!

d also maybe just have solo living room dance parties because you are lucky enough to live at home.

I have these all the time! Most fun!

I usually save my solo living room dance parties for when my boyfriend is out. Which happens very rarely, since he's super-introverted and works from home.

You should say, "Hey, go read at the park, I need some dancing time!" ;D No, but that is one of the best things about living alone. I can dance in my underwear in the living room in the middle of the night and no one cares!

Oops, by "live at home," I meant "live alone." You got what I meant. And yeah, I've taken to just having dance parties when he's home and on his computer with his head phones. He totally knows I'm doing it, but I just pretend he doesn't.

hihihi lauren omg when i got to the part about you starting dance, i shrieked a little and i'm going to share with my (probably unhelpful) advice. hehe. when i started dancing, it was omfgsoawkward because i was in a group and god i was so bad but i was short and near-sighed so i literally could not see anything if i was in the back so i had to force myself to the front (but to the side because the middle would probably give me a heart attack) and anyway SUPER EMBARRASSING but the thing is, you kinda realize after awhile that everyone's too busy paying attention to the teacher to really notice what you're doing so if expenses don't work out, i really do encourage a group class because while it can feel super embarrassing, in the end, people are usually super encouraging and supportive and sometimes it's nice to be surrounded by people who are trying and loving the same things you do :) but then again! i totally get the social anxiety thing too and if private classes work better go for it!!!

in my experience, it's a lot about the practiceee. i would say, definitely use a mirror if you can, especially when you're first starting. hip-hop can be a hard genre to start with though, just because it's a form of street-dancing so a lot of the moves are really like... smooth or sharp and are things that people grew up doing or just naturally have a flow for, especially since a lot of hip-hop ends up being improv but once you get the hang of it, it can be super fun! so i would say if you are starting with that sorta hip-hop-y dance, don't give up! it can definitely be challenging at first! and also, when you're doing actual choreography, it really helps if you know the song backwards and forwards and can notice the little beats and know all the lyrics and stuff because singing along is SO HELPFUL.

anyway!! i really hope it goes well for you!! and you get to do awesome kpop dances!! (i got to do taeyang's wedding dress, and sorta worked on be mine but then TIME CRUNCH. HEHEHE but in our show, there were 5 girls who did SHINee and some SNSD and i have a friend (in america) who did CHASER and BE MINE and PARADISE and i cried ;~;)

let us know how it goes!! IM SO EXCITED FOR YOU! dancing is so much fun :DD

ALSO OGS FJDKSLFJSDKLFJDSKLFJSDKLFJSDF

im trying to go to the NY show but... :/ not really sure if it's going to work out ;~; my friend's gna try to get us tickets but then i need to worry about transportation and UGH SO MUCH MONEY. but i'm so glad you can go!!! :DD you'll have to share with us /everythingggg/

EDIT: so i just realized i mentioned hip-hop is hard to start but didn't say what was easy to start and so *fail* ummm. it's different for everyone (who knows, you might have a natural affinity for hip hop ;D) but i think generally, basic jazz or something a little more lyrical is usually a good starting point ^^ contemp can be really hard because of the control and stuff but jazz is usually lower and loser but with more ~structure than hip-hop.

Edited 2013-09-04 00:54 (UTC)

I KNOW. SO EXPENSIVE. In college or before I never would have been able to do it. Literally the only reason I can is because I'm on my own now and I'm going to spend my money the way I want to DAMMIT. I'M A GROWN ASS WOMAN AND I CAN SPEND IT ON A KPOP BOYBAND CONCERT IF I WANT!

Anyway, I hope that everything works out for you and you'll get to go! *fingers crossed*

And thank you again for the tips!

Aw, I'm so happy the dancing worked out for you even if you were super embarrassed at first! The embarrassment is part of it for me, but mostly it's because when I was in school, the teacher would go over the steps like three times and then make us do it and everyone else was fine but I was NOT. I didn't know it yet! If everyone else needed to go over it three times, I needed to go over it seven. But the teachers never slowed down to help me catch up (and I didn't want them to--I didn't want to be the person holding everyone back) and so I ended up never accomplishing anything.

Thank you so much for your tips! That's really sweet of you to share!

INFINITE DANCES. The stuff of dreams!

Thank you thank you! :D

oh gosh i understand that too; i picked some stuff up really slowly, especially as i was first starting out. i think, once you get used to the pace though, it will be ok! but i know that's super terrifying at first and once you fall behind it's so hard to catch up. what i did was i had a friend with me haha she had some experience in dance so i made her review steps with me in our spare time away from the class so that i could get those extra four times :) even if you don't have a friend ~experienced, you can still grab a buddy and it always helps when there are two minds because if you forget something, maybe he/she has remembered it! (but of course, this is only if you end up going the group lesson way in case finances don't work out or something!)

(omg if you do end up dancing and we're in the same area lets do infinite dances together *sobs* i've always wanted to do paradise but those DARNED HIP THRUSTS god they don't look attractive on me LOL I FEEL SO SILLY WHEN I DO THEM but then i see dongwoo dancing and im like ;~; how is there such perfection)

I have no interest in Infinite, but if you are coming to DC for the concert, we should hang out!

I have no advice on the dancing, but YAY I hope you find an instructor because that sounds like fun!

I would love that! I don't know if the time thing will work out--it's on like a Wed., so it's entirely possible I'll fly in that afternoon, spend one night and fly back home the next morning. But if I do, that would be lovely. You and Alexandra!

Thank you!! I hope you've been well lately! I never make it over to dreamwidth, so I know I'm missing out on you and deird and some other people, but I do really hope life's treating you well!

Well, let me know when you make your travel plans!

I have not been that exciting over on DW, so you're not missing much, lol. I have been busy at work and otherwise into making Marvel comics icons. Oh! Possibly relevant to your interests - I just read Gone with the Wind for the first time ever, and meta/review/feels are incoming.

If you come to DC and have time around Infinite, I would LOVE to see you!!

And if you can't find someone to go/stay with, you're totally welcome to crash at my house (I'm fifteen minutes outside the city). I still live with my loud and eccentric family, but we do have a guest bedroom, and I don't think any relatives will be using it past Monday the 11th (assuming that the concert is November 13th, which is what some quick Googling told me). And actually, I'd go to the concert, too, if you needed someone. I don't have much interest in watching music videos, but I'd be up for live Infinite dancing.

And yay you-dancing! I hope you find something you enjoy.

You are the absolute sweetest! I have no idea how things are going to work out, but I might take you up on that possibly. And you are the best to offer to go too! I think I'll be able to find some friends who are already going so you won't have to spend money on a group you're not into. Thank you thank you for being lovely!

LAUREN. Hello! I was just thinking about you yesterday. <3 <3

Good luck with your dancing adventures! Just in case you think you might want to try something, er, slower first in your kinesthetic efforts, may I recommend yoga again. One of the nice things about it is that you're generally not on a time table, at least not nearly as much, especially for hatha yoga, which is my favorite. Basically, you work on getting into position, and then you work on staying in position. Since I am rhythmically challenged, this works very well for me. And yoga has been huge for me in learning to become more comfortable with my body and feel less self-conscious about it, because that's a big thing for me, too.

I think I totally missed that you were going to Vienna! Speaking of, I AM IN GERMANY RIGHT NOW. I am visiting a college friend, and soon we're going over to London for a few days and I will get to meet

brutti_ma_buoni. SO EXCITING. (I haven't really seen anything yet, though; I spent yesterday getting over jet lag. But now I feel like a person!)

Plz to be reccing me your progressive theology blogs! Rachel Held Evans is a fav of mine, and I've been getting more interested in Peter Enns, but I welcome more recs. (I am not going to church right now either, partly for not-having-a-car reasons but also partly because I don't know how to find a church that won't try to save me from new more socially/theologically liberal ways but won't me freak me out by being way farther than I am on that spectrum.)

Edited 2013-09-04 07:04 (UTC)

Hello hello! I am so glad to hear from you!

I definitely wanted to do yoga with my sister while she was here (she had a Y membership and could get me in with her) but since she's gone my desire to do it shriveled up a bit. But I'm definitely keeping my mind open to it, especially if I can work the dancing thing out. I'm so glad it's working out for you. It sounds amazing.

I SAW YOUR POST ABOUT EUROPE I'M SO EXCITED FOR YOU! I hope you're having a blast, and London is amazing and you will love it yay for meeting with friends! I don't know where you are in Germany, but if you get a chance Neuchwahnstein is totally worth going to see. It's kind of in the middle of nowhere like a two hour train ride from Munich, but it's a big tourist attraction so it's pretty easy to get there. And it's crazy cool.

Yeah, the first day you get anywhere far away is a total waste of a day, but I'm so glad you feel better today. OH I HOPE YOU HAVE SUCH FUN.

partly because I don't know how to find a church that won't try to save me from new more socially/theologically liberal ways but won't me freak me out by being way farther than I am on that spectrum

Exactly. This is a problem where I am too because there are the A) conservative evangelical churches, B) the hipster conservative evangelical churches, and C) the hipster churches. And...yeah, none of those work for me. I did really love the one I was going to service-wise, but it just got to be too much emotionally to go every week and not have anyone talk to me. I mean, people greeted me during the peace, but I wasn't even friendly acquaintances with anyone and it was just too much for me to handle. If I'd made ONE friend I could sit with sometimes or something, someone to go to the things with, I would have been fine. But it didn't happen, so...it's kind of fizzled off.

Anyway, blogs. I think the best thing about RHE is that she has a really approachable style that means that the commenting discussions are quite interesting, so I do quite like her site. I love Peter Enns a lot, though I haven’t been reading him as much lately because he’s so Old Testament/Genesis-focused and I’ve already figured out that I read it as holy myth. :D I like Slacktivist a lot. I really like Fred Clark, who runs it, but it’s also got a really consistently interesting commenting community that I love (trolls aside, which they do get. Also I know you’ll recognize at least one commenter who isn’t me but who is on your flist and recently got married…). Richard Beck’s Experimental Theology is great (he comes out of my denomination, too, so that’s cool) and his stuff on disgust theory/purity is incredibly enlightening and unique (he's a psychologist, not a preacher, so his perspective is awesome). I just started looking through theamericanjesus.net, and I really love diannaeanderson.net for a feminist twist on things. I sometimes read Roger Olson’s stuff on patheos because his whole ~thing is anti-Calvinism, which I appreciate. And there are loads of people on patheos, actually, sometimes I just like to browse and find things that way.

I know there are others, and I'll link you if I remember what they are! Honestly, if you just read Slacktivist, Fred does TONS of links to other sites (he has several link roundups like “7 things at 7” and “smart people saying smart things” and things like that that are just full of interesting links that will lead you to interesting places) that will probably provide you with tons of other people.

Yay, thank you so much for the links! I originally discovered RHE (and Peter Enns through her) via that mutual Slacktivist friend you speak of. :D I haven't cared much for Fred Clarke, because too often for my tastes he slams the opposing view and the people holding it exactly the same way that I've had pastors slam liberal thinking and theology, and I can't deal. Links roundups might be good anyway, though, and I shall definitely looking into the others! I've read a little bit of Dianna Anderson and the experimental theology guy for RHE's links. (Although, I've never paid any attention to her comments section; maybe I should do that.)

I'm so sorry for your church difficulties. :( I wouldn't be able to deal with that either. It is deeply disappointing that no one ever tried to draw you into the church social circle, though.

Also I meant to say--I do not think that online communities can completely replace the need to be engaged in a physical church body--especially because lack of Communion--but I do think they're the next best thing. I honestly feel more ~plugged into a spiritual conversation at this point than I have at other times when I was attending church regularly. Which I know is because of me, but I think it's a suitable substitute at the moment. I genuinely would LOVE to be really a part of a church, I really would. I always loved it growing up, especially our awesome youth group. But at the moment I can't seem to make it happen, and I think gathering in His name online is how I keep growing spiritually. In case you wanted my ~thoughts on that. :D

*nod* The most consistent Christian community I've had over the last nine years - since I went away to college - has been a mailing list for Christian SF fans. I've stayed in touch with them through five states, one foreign country, and probably a dozen moves. Physical churches just can't compete under those conditions. :)

INFINITE ARE NOT COMING TO AUSTRALIA, LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING

(Sad for you and J that you won’t get to go together tho. I VOLUNTEER MYSELF TBH.)

Congrats on the new novel idea!! The dream prompt is a magical thing. Best wishes with writing.

Also in the dream the love interest was Sunggyu. I kid you not.
S O B B I N G

And I was thinking about kdramas and how they seem bent on giving me a schoolboy kink.
TROLOLOLOLOLOL @ your life. Speaking of which, Zoe just told me I should watch School 2013. I assume you would endorse this too?

OMG YOU ARE GOING TO BE DOING CONTEMPORARY POP DANCING THIS IS SO EXCITING AND MY JAM (although I basically never dance anymore since high school). All I can say is that I endorse this fully and have faith in u. Keep on with your bad self. Oh, and I think I second the suggestion to check out videos maybe to start off with. OMG WHAT IF YOU LEARNED ALL OF INFINITE’S DANCES I WOULD SCREEEEEEAM. (I WISH WE ALL LIVED IN THE SAME PLACE SO WE COULD ALL DO IT TOGETHER O M G.)

I seriously don't get why they aren't doing Australia. Even just one show. REALLY? I was totally shocked. AND ALSO ANGRY FOR YOU. (If you came to see a show with me I WOULD DIE OF HAPPINESS AND YOU WOULD BE RESPONSIBLE.)

Thank you thank you! And yeah, Infinite has recently started popping up in my dreams. The other night I was back in high school and for some reason Dongwoo was there? And I had a crush on him and one of my friends was like, "I hope the guy you have a crush on isn't the one right over there because he's ugly." And I almost KILLED her because I was like, "HE UNDERSTANDS ENGLISH YOU KNOW HOW COULD YOU BE SO MEAN?" Honestly, it was a quite realistic dream because I never actually could work up the courage to actually talk to him and just blushed and smiled at him and stuff, and when I woke up, I was like, "Yup, that's exactly what I would be like around him." ANYWAY.

TROLOLOLOLOLOL @ your life.

IT'S NOT FUNNY IT'S A VERY SERIOUS PROBLEM.

Let me put it this way: Ranya's tag for School 2013 on tumblr is "Don't watch School 2013." YOU WILL CRY AND IT WILL TORTURE YOU WITH BFF FEELS AND RIP OUT YOUR HEART. (Absolutely watch it!)

THANK YOU THANK YOU I NEED YOUR FAITH! I am the opposite of graceful so we'll see if I manage to not hurt myself! (Basically I will be Kim Myungsoo trying to dance. I swear.)

OMG WHAT IF YOU LEARNED ALL OF INFINITE’S DANCES I WOULD SCREEEEEEAM. (I WISH WE ALL LIVED IN THE SAME PLACE SO WE COULD ALL DO IT TOGETHER O M G.)

I KNOW. THE STUFF OF MY DREAMS. I NEED TO FIND SIX OTHER FRIENDS TO DO IT WITH ME. (WE SHOULD ALL LIVE TOGETHER SOMEWHERE IN A COMMUNE AND WATCH TV TOGETHER AND DO INFINITE DANCES.)

idk man maybe they think the fanbase isn't big enough in Australia? LIES.

I WILL NEVER UNDERSTOOD PEOPLE WHO THINK DONGWOO IS UGLY, WTF. The dream version of your friend is the worst, lol. Speaking of Infinite dreams, I too had an Infinite dream in which I went karaoke-ing with Kim Myungsoo. Yep. We sang "Nothing's Over" together.

YOU WILL CRY AND IT WILL TORTURE YOU WITH BFF FEELS AND RIP OUT YOUR HEART.
:D :D :D

WE SHOULD ALL LIVE TOGETHER SOMEWHERE IN A COMMUNE AND WATCH TV TOGETHER AND DO INFINITE DANCES.
DON'T MAKE ME CRY

(I WISH WE ALL LIVED IN THE SAME PLACE SO WE COULD ALL DO IT TOGETHER O M G.)
what is wrong with you omfg PAIN IS ME don't say things like that it's just mean =___=

lady, posting under my real identity (so much as one can have such things on the Internet. ha) to say: IF YOU ARE GOING TO DC I AM GOING WITH YOU. I don't quite know how I'll swing it on this end -- I floated the idea of the husband going up for work and us taking his mom to watch the kids and making a family trip out of it -- but midweek it may be easier for me to just go on my own. I am justifying the cost by pointing to all the work I'm doing to help clear out my dad's house, which he would have to pay a significant amount of money to movers/packers. Or something. There's logic there somewhere.

Re dancing: I would suggest contra, but I think that would make you too self-conscious? (Contra, from my experience of it, is fairly forgiving, especially of newbies; what your feet do doesn't matter much so long as you get them from point A to point B at the right time. As opposed to Scottish country dancing, where your teachers will also care about pointy toes and jump style.) So I will say that Dance Dance Revolution was my primary form of exercise for several years. Every version I've played has a Training Mode and a no-fail Workout Mode, where you can program it to throw songs at you for a certain number of minutes. (Also re private tutors: maybe find classes you would be interested in, if you were interested in classes, and contact the teacher directly?)

also: HOORAY NOVEL IDEA!

Edited 2013-09-04 15:40 (UTC)

Oh yay yay yay! I'd been meaning to message you since I wasn't sure if you were sure yet about being able to go. That's fantastic news! I'm looking forward to it even more now!

And I'm cool with your logic! :D

I have some friends who used to contra and loved it, but I'm not sure about it myself. I might have to look into DDR, though! That's a quite good idea!

maybe find classes you would be interested in, if you were interested in classes, and contact the teacher directly?

I've found someone I'm going to email that way, yeah, so I'm gonna keep my eyes out for others.

Thank you so much!

YAY YOU! It's good to hear an update! *loves*

*twirls you*

Oh no, I'm sorry you suffered from the heat so much in Vienna! That was indeed one of the hottest time of that summer /o\ but LOL at your air conditioning rant because as much as I hate the heat (I HATE IT SO MUCH) air conditioning is really not my friend, like not. I mean I'm all for it in the jam-packed metro because otherwise we all die etc etc (note : not all the metros have AC and let's not even with the buses). But so not a fan of the violent air conditioning that some places practice. I'm really sensitive to temperature shocks and when there is like ten degrees (Celsius) difference and you have to go in and out of places I find myself being even weaker than the outside heat already makes me. Plus, then I get cold. And then I get sick (I don't ever get sick ok). But tbf France definitely isn't the hottest country around, so I might revise my position if I ever end up living in a place where the heat is unbearable for months (and not just a few days/weeks).

I can't wait for you fic remix! When will it be posted? If I miss it, I count on you to crosspost after the reveals, y? :)

YAY FOR ORIGINAL WORK PROJECT :DD I wish you all the faith and focus ♥

The dancing thing sounds like a great idea!!! I hope it works out for you :)

I didn't read all the other comments cause there were so many and I've been an insomniac tonight and now about to crash so I apologize if someone already said this or something like it.

A long time ago I needed to take dance lessons and the way I ended up doing it was finding a high school student who had been a long time dance student, was still a dance student (and assistant instructor) but also was qualified to teach beginning dance.

The upside is, they may have access to the studio where they take their own lessons and the cost will probably be less than if you go to like... the owner of a dance studio and have them teach you especially privately.

The downside is, they may not be as patient as you might find with a more experienced instructor.

That's really all I've got right now. I think dance is a great idea for exercise. My other suggestion would be swimming. I find it hard however to find a pool where there's not a lot of people, it's summer it's hot etc, and I am very self conscious, anxious around other people.

Good luck in any case with finding a way to be more active.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

so people are making 'this is what's up with me' posts so i thought i'd make one too?

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