![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
in which i vomit feelings about this ridiculous boy band all over the place
I am going to go ahead and apologize in advance about this, y'all. This is one part pimp-post of DOOM, two-parts me spewing incoherent feelings on everything in the world, with a dash of meta and some drooling thrown in. It's basically a big giant mess, just like I am these days. I am so, so sorry. Please just love me anyway.
This is a post about these kids:
source
Awww! Aren't they cute? Well, forget all about that.
Introduction
(or: they're sexy and they know it)
Note: I am blaming this opening on ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
aerintine because she enables me. Ahem.
LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE FEMALE GAZE.
Gah, this is so over-the-top in its invitation to look at the beautiful boys and drool over how sexy they are. Like, it's so over-the-top that I'm almost ashamed for falling for it. Except that I am not even a little bit ashamed because THESE BOYS ARE REALLY HOT and they are playing to my gaze and there is no room for shame here in being a woman and having a sex drive and thinking guys are hot. I love it.
Part I: Music and Me
(or: this part will only be relevant to my friends who were wondering what happened to my sanity)
source
Y'all, in the last couple of weeks of falling for this silly little kpop band, I have sometimes wondered whether it actually makes sense to be this obsessed with a band whose music I care nothing about. This is not what I do. I never went through the boyband phase back in the heyday of N'SYNC and BSB--my friends were all crazy about them, and I was listening to Queen and Paul Simon (inheriting my daddy's taste--he has really good taste in music) and also, like, dc Talk and such. I know some of the boy band songs, but I never had any crushes on them and I never had any of the albums and I never cared. I still don't get really into the people who create the music that I enjoy--I mean, how much do I love Led Zeppelin's music? And how much do I really not care about Plant and Page and whatever? I worship Patty Griffin's music, but I really don't care about what's going on in her life?
I don't know what I'm trying to say except that music fandom has always pretty much eluded me. Until I accidentally tripped into Infinite because Myungsoo was in Shut Up! Flower Boy Band (which I would pay y'all to watch: IT IS SO GOOD) and I ended up watching clips of Sesame Player and now I've worked my way through You Are My Oppa and Sesame Player and now I'm watching Birth of a Family. And I just love these boys. They are just so hilarious and cute and adorable and they love each other so much. And they're talented. (And, all of a sudden, extremely hot. But more on that anon.)
But I still don't really care about the music? Some of their songs have grown on me, some of them I don't care about. But I'm never going to be into kpop for the music. That just isn't going to happen. I don't listen to Top 40 here for a reason--while I do love a good really poppy pop song (yes, One Direction, I think "What Makes You Beautiful" is hella fun), I mostly like music involving actual instruments (which is NOT to slam on electronically-produced stuff--it can be brilliant, it just usually isn't for me). I love rock. I love the blues (love the blues). I love bluegrass and more of the stripped-down country/Americana/folk. I love singer-songwriter stuff. I love classical and orchestral music. I love church music, from Sacred Harp up through Rachmaninoff's Vespers. (I wish I liked jazz, since it's apparently music for smart people, but I guess I'm not that smart because I don't like it.) That's not going to change any time soon, I don't think. I may like to bop around the house to ABBA sometimes, but mostly I'm going to stick to other types of things.
But. I have to admit that I am in kpop fandom now. It's happened.
Part II: The Greatest Video Ever
(or: a brief introduction to the boys being supremely silly that proves why you should find them endearing)
I've thought that Myungsoo is beautiful since the first episode of SUFBB. And I was really taken with him when I watched clips of him on youtube because, as I said in another post, I have this huge soft spot for people who are trying to be cool and just aren't. But I didn't really expect to be taken with the rest of the boys, but I have been.
So let me share with you this video again, and I will talk about it and how much I love these kids.
Things I love about this video:
+ The fact that they're having a dance party to their own music in a hotel room in Singapore. Because of course they are.
+ Sungjongie looks adorable in that hoodie that's flopping around everywhere.
+ MYUNGSOO IS SO RIDICULOUS. Like, making fun of himself and his tendency to look ridiculous when he's dancing and his tendency to fall over and the fact that gravity loves Myungsoo the most. People who can make fun of themselves: my favorite. And I love that he's not laughing out loud at himself: he's weirdly intense in a very Myungsoo sort of way even in this moment of supreme silliness. What a weird kid. I love it.
+ Dongwoo's laugh. BEST LAUGH IN THE WORLD. He just bubbles over with joy.
+ Dongwoo looks so cute in his glasses! Awwww!
+ OMG WOOHYUN YOU ARE SUCH A FLIRT. I seriously think there has never been a guy who so much wants to present himself for the female gaze. He is always playing to the ladies, always flirting. They call him "greasy" for a reason. Not that I'm complaining because:
+ WOOHYUN HAS SOME ABS. And they are pretty.
+ And his arms aren't bad, either. (I think of Buffy: "Did you see his arms? Those are some good arms to have.")
+ And, okay, his butt looks great, too.
+ Sungjong attacking him with the pillows because he is the most ridiculous. He totally deserves it.
+ Sunggyu not even making it it through more than one move before the guys all mock him to death. These kids love to persecute their leader, and it is glorious.
+ Hoya's dance. Hoya and I have some issues (see below), but his dance is hysterical to me. What a goof. We don't get to see this side of Hoya often enough, imo.
+ They don't remember to call Myungsoo "L" until halfway through the video.
+ Myungsoo tripping over the bed. THIS CHILD.
+ Hoya's accent when he speaks English that doesn't sound like any other accent I've ever heard and is so adorable it hurts.
The only thing I do not like about this video: Sungyeol isn't in it, because he was sick that night. I can only imagine how much better it would be if he were. Watch this video of ridiculousness and let your imagination run wild.
Part III: The Boys
(or: way too many words and feelings about these people I have never met)
And now for some thoughts on each of the boys. I'm going in reverse-age-order because everyone always goes in age order and I want to shake things up a bit.
+ Lee Sungjong
dob: september 3, 1993
source
LEMON CANDY LEE SUNGJONG. This kid's hips do not lie! Sungjongie started out so adorable I almost can't stand it but has transitioned into being THE FIERCE ONE. He's the baby (maknae) of the group, and to quote this invaluable post, he enjoys girl group dances and being a brat. Actually, less of a brat these days: he's finally grown up and has that androgynous beautiful boy thing going on. He's very pious, which is sweet, and loveslovesloves girl group dances. And kills at them. I don't know how his ass does what it does. SERIOUSLY? He apparently learns the dances after watching them like twice and then makes his hyungs watch him do them and tell him that he's better than the original performers. HA. He also apparently told Sunggyu early on after they first met, "Hyung, a face like mine is rare." He's incredibly aware of his own attractiveness to the point almost of vanity, but it's not obnoxious the way it could be.
As an aside, my all-time favorite Sungjong-is-pretty moment was in Sesame Player when the boys have to clean the dorm because they're told that a girl band is coming to visit. The guys all start speculating on who it is, and Sunggyu interrupts and says, "It doesn't matter who comes. Sungjong is probably prettier." And Sungjong does this half matter-of-fact agreement/half preening face, and it is GLORIOUS.
He takes out his frustration with his hyungs (specifically Sunggyu) by beating up on his teddy bears. And he needs to do it, too; part of the whole kpop boy band ~thing~ is that the maknae is everyone's bitch, and while most of the other boys don't treat Sungjong this way, Sunggyu does quite often and sometimes the other boys pile on, and poor Jongie gets frustrated and who can blame him? Poor kid. I actually got mad at the other guys in a couple of their variety shows for the way they treat him. But apparently he's gotten really scary when he's angry. Recently they did something that made him mad and he stormed off and sat in the van without them and they all came out and crowded around and were trying to figure out how to apologize and he leaned out of the car and yells SHUT UP in banmal and now they're all terrified of him. I love it.
He's the only member of the band with anything like dignity and his default reaction to everything these days seems to be to roll his eyes while the others act like idiots. I would love to watch a show where he offers commentary on his hyungs, because I know he would be snarky as hell and it would be glorious. The other boys will be acting like fools (as they do) and he's just sitting there with his legs crossed being totally unimpressed.
He also seems less comfortable with his effeminate reputation these days. He never seemed to take issue with it before (talking about his 24 inch waist and doing girl group dances at the drop of a hat), but now he seems intent on proving that he is MANLY (the other guys all agree that he is). My suspicion is that this is because he's growing up and wanting to be an adult, and he seems to somehow view this as going hand-in-hand with being more "manly." He said on a recent variety show that he doesn't really like to do girl group dances anymore. I don't know if he doesn't enjoy them anymore (doubtful) or if he just doesn't enjoy performing them in front of people and what that signifies. I imagine it does get annoying to be told you're a pretty little girl all the time, but I hope he finds a comfortable middle ground, because I really think his androgyny is one of his strong points. [Basically, I enjoy his gender performance. Though not as much as Woohyun's, which is more subtle but way more about juxtaposition.]
He can flip on his "I am a sex god worship me" mode during performances, and it's kind of jaw-dropping. Despite his effimenence and love of girl group dances and everyone's assumptions, he is not gay--he likes girls very much (chubby ones, actually). He seems to absolutely adore any kind of animal (I've yet to see him encounter an animal that he doesn't take into his heart immediately--on one variety show they locked him in a room full of frogs and he was totally happy). He's fabulous.
I miss his BTD hair like I miss a person. At the time he was too young to really objectify properly without me feeling guilty, but if he was to bring that hair back? All bets would be off. ALL BETS WOULD BE OFF.
+ Kim Myungsoo (L)
dob: march 13, 1992
I already have a post just word-vomiting about Myungsoo/L, but I'll briefly go over my feelings about him again.
So initially I became aware of him as a giant dorky spazz, because I watched clips from Sesame Player first, and that's who he is in that show. This speaks to me, obviously. He's physically awkward, has the world's dorkiest laugh, makes the derpiest faces on the planet (so much so that I am actually running a tumblr blog dedicated to his derpiness), zones out completely a lot of the time, and is just plain weird.
But then I went back and watched You Are My Oppa, in which he sits around sullenly for most of the show. I kind of love this, too, him trying to be a sullen, petulant ice prince because I love people who just want everyone to go away and leave them alone because I am often like this. I think most of the time this is a front, and that he was really trying to create this personae that he'd either decided to create or been assigned by the company (my suspicions: the latter). His personae is ~mysterious~ and ~cool~ and that's what he was going for on that show and most of the time on stage. It's probably a good thing for him: the way he's able to separate who he really is (spazzy yet introverted) from who he's supposed to be as an idol (ice prince). This is where the whole not-as-cool-as-he-wants-to-appear-to-be comes in.
And yes, he is the introverted one. He's by far the calmest of the boys (Hoya aside), and sometimes he does just seem like he wants to sit in the corner and chill while the rest of them freak out. This may sound strange, but I actually worry about him because I just know he doesn't get enough alone time, and we all know introverts need that. I think the idol thing was never really part of his plan--it's not really suited to his personality, really--but he's made this decision and he's going to work very hard and take criticism silently and just do what he can. He's very determined, and I appreciate that. He works very, very hard; there's absolutely no doubt that his his the voice that has improved the most since the boys debuted. He isn't ever going to be the best singer of the group (Woohyun and Sunggyu have so much natural talent that no one else could ever touch them), but he's come really far, and I'm very proud of him. He also seems to be working equally hard on his acting career, and I think he'll make a perfectly good little actor someday, though I imagine his range will always be limited.
In other Myungsoo-is-a-dork news, he loveslovesloves romance mangas, nunchucking, the color black, and he's something of a fashion disaster when left to his own devices. He admits that he becomes easily obsessed (and he's the CLINGIEST KID ON EARTH OMG), and I can so see that. He loves photography and seems to take it quite seriously. He also seems to me to be quite uncomfortable with the attention that gets paid to his looks--I think he finds it pretty irrelevant about himself, honestly. I like that about him.
Oh, crap, I forgot to talk about his face. His face is a big deal, okay? He's the visual in the band, which literally means he's there to be good-looking. He could have easily coasted on his looks, but instead, he works hard as I've said, and wants to make a contribution. I don't want to be all "poor him, he's so attractive," but it does have to get annoying to be told in EVERY INTERVIEW YOU EVER DO "Oh, you're so handsome." And for everyone to not expect much of you just because they assume you got what you have because of your face. And there's no doubt that his face is a work of art. But he wants to be more than that, and I love him for that.
And I blame him for everything. I blame him for getting me into kpop, I blame him for me having all of these feelings, I blame him for every problem in the world. It's all his fault. Jerk.
+ Lee Sungyeol
dob: august 27, 1991
Lee Sungyeol is my prince. In any other group on the planet, Dongwoo would be the weird one, but this band has Lee Sungyeol, and no one will ever be stranger than Sungyeollie. He's just incredibly weird, and I mean that in the best sense of the word. The others call him choding (elementary school kid) because he just gets into messes all the time, and it is the most adorable thing when he does.
He used to have the world's most adorable chipmunk cheeks, but he's losing his babyfat now, so they aren't as obvious. On the other hand, he has a very untoned stomach that he hasn't lost despite maturing, which I find ridiculously endearing. He's very, very emotional and cries at anything sentimental, which makes me love him (he seems to be stabalizing a bit, truthfully, which was to be expected, but he's still more emotional than any of the other guys but Dongwoo).
I totally fell in love with him in Sesame Player where he was so silly and lovable and has this really weird, throaty laugh that I love more than I can say. Then, recently and out of the blue, he went through a couple of weeks where he seemed to be really toned-down and low-key, and it was super-confusing. That said, confusing as it was, his behavior on the first two episodes of Ranking King was amazing--he clearly didn't care about anything that was going on and threw out snarky questions and comments here and there (asking Woohyun why he was shorter today--he wasn't wearing his lifts--and telling Sunggyu that he couldn't see his eyes. WONDERFUL BOY). He's always been the witty one, in an off-beat way, but he was so hella snarky those first few episodes of Ranking King that I almost died. He's since recovered most of his energy, though I do think his volume is a bit lower now than in the past, which I think is just a sign of maturity. He keeps talking about being more mature and having more confidence, so I think he's working quite hard at that. As hard as he can work, anyway.
There's no doubt in my mind that Sungyeol is the smartest one in this band. His strangeness might detract from that, but if you pay attention, he's obviously sharp as a whip--he's always throwing out insightful, witty comments. As we all know, I like smart people. But his mind is so different than anyone else's that you almost don't notice how smart he is.
I get angry on his behalf because he rarely gets many lines in the songs and very little face-time in videos, either. His problem is his lack of confidence--he's by no means a singer, but he can pull off more than he's trusted with when it's in the right range (look at the "Bangkok City" performance and you'd never know he has singing problems) and while the choreography looks different when he does it (he's so lanky with these long limbs that even though he knows all the moves, it just looks looser and less clean than when the other guys perform), he masters it well--but he doesn't believe that he can. So he messes up the notes more than the other guys when they're performing because he lets that lack of confidence trip him up. He gets the fewest lines BY FAR in the songs as a result. They often try to make up for it by letting him do more in the MV, which I appreciate. He's just far and away the most insecure one in the group, and though he covers that most of the time with his antics, I can still see it: I think he carries all those insecurities around with him. He's seemed a little more confident lately--he promised in his message on their latest EP that he was working on that, and I really hope he is. Basically I want to wrap him up in blankets and giving him good things to eat and tell him that he's wonderful.
This video pretty much encapsulates all of his issues, and I kind of teared up when I watched it. For once he's center-stage, but he can't trust that: he has to keep glancing back and getting reassurance from Leader Gyu that he's doing things right (Woohyun is oblivious, because of course he is, but this is one of those times when I think Sunggyu must be a really good leader, because he doesn't hesitate to offer that encouragement that Sungyeol needs).
One last thing and then I'll shut up about this kid: music/being an idol isn't his primary interest. He wants to act. He was in a sitcom for a while, but it seems from the outside looking in that he hasn't had much luck since then though he's still trying. I can't help but think that this is somehow tied to his lack of confidence, as is the fact that he was originally with SM (one of the Big Three entertainment companies) training to be an MC (which he would be great at, actually) before he made it over to Woollim somehow (still a bit unclear on how that happened). But that had to kind of feel like movie backwards. I really hope he gets some roles soon. I want him to have what he wants.
+ Lee Howon (Hoya)
dob: march 28, 1991
I have developed a few issues with Hoya. He's said some things about black people that, while I truly believe come from a place of ignorance in an attempt to be truly complimentary, are ridiculous enough that it's affected my affection for him. Somebody needs to sit him down and educate him. I know that things are different in a society that's much more homogenous, but really: his entire dance machine thing is one big appropriation of black culture and while I don't blame him for that (most of kpop is one big appropriation of black culture, but that's another topic, and a complex one), I do think that he has a responsibility to educate himself on this topic since that's what he's making his living off of it.
Anyway, that aside I'm pretty okay with him. He's the official dance machine of the group and is very good at it: he gets into the dancing, which is endearing. Has the world's most adorable accent when he speaks in English. He's known for having amazing instincts. He seems like a very gentle guy, which I greatly appreciate in a guy, especially because he's the manly-man of the group. He can be really sweet, but he also has a sharp tongue sometimes and they don't let him talk much in interviews because he has a very adult sense of humor. He's HILARIOUS when picking on Sunggyu.
He's even more quiet than Myungsoo can be, but he's more laid-back (Myungsoo has can be moody and probably a bit of a bitch--Hoya seems to just go with the flow most of the time). He has a really sweet smile.
And you have to respect him for making his dreams a reality. He dropped out of high school without his parents' permission to pursue his dancing dreams. I think they were very, very disappointed, but he worked hard and got into Infinite and has made good, and I'm sure they're incredibly proud of him now. I'm so glad he's been successful.
But mostly I only get excited about him when he interacts with the other boys (specifically Dongwoo and Sungjong--I would watch a TV show about him giving Sungjong piggyback rides and the way he kept cracking jokes on SP about how he and Dongwoo were filming We Got Married made me laugh). I couldn't possibly dislike anyone who loves Dongwoo and Sungjong as much as he does, because that means he has awesome taste. One of my all-time favorite moments from anyone in the band was when he was asked in a written interview how he was such good friends with Sungjong when they seem so different (they've been roommates for years), and his answer was: "Sungjongie is my matter of interest." I still grin when I think about that.
+ Nam Woohyun
dob: february 8, 1991
The first thing Woohyun wants you to notice about him is that is a very good-looking guy. And he has reason for this: I mean, he's hot! I love his nose. He has beautiful abs. He likes to show them off. I do not complain. He has a drawer full of skin care products and makeup, because of course he does. He can seem like a strutting peacock, but I think that covers up some insecurities and is more what he thinks he needs to be rather than what he really is (see below).
As I mention above, he is the world's biggest flirt. His main goal in life seems to be showing everyone just how much he loves the ladies and how much they love him. He's also a giant ham; he's always performing. He seems so very aware of what's expected of him as an idol and he's determined to give it. So he's definitely the most fanservice-y. And I think he thinks of himself as an idol before he does as a musician, despite the fact that he's one of the main vocalists of the group and has an awesome voice. They call him greasy, which means he's over-the-top with his fanservice, with his flirting, with his saying things to ingratiate himself with fans (talking about how he doesn't need a girlfriend because Inspirits are all his girlfriend, things like that). It's kind of like smarminess, but more pointed, I guess? I really don't think this has anything to do with who he really is away from the cameras--I think somehow early on he settled on that role (or someone settled on it for him) and now it's expected and so he still does it. Boy works hard and is absolutely committed. You could never say otherwise.
He can be an annoying troll, but mostly in an endearing way. And I think he's probably vain but manages to come off that way without really being arrogant? I don't know. He seems like a pretty good guy, and I find people who view their ultimate identity as that of performer really interesting, and he strikes me that way.
I've decided that he's basically the male version of Mini from Skins: totally building his identity around how he appears to others. He's lost a huge amount of weight since his trainee days--he used to have this adorable round face and be a bit chubby in a completely cute way, but he's honed his body down to reveal the abs of glory. I think he gets too skinny sometimes--you can see his ribs on occasion--and I worry that he doesn't take care of himself like he should. That he sees his body as something to be looked at rather than as something to serve him, you know?
I also know that he has to know that people call him greasy/a whore/whatever, and that has to affect him. I don't think he actually likes being the greasy one, but that is the role he's taken on, as I've said, and he definitely sells it. Honestly, his is the mental health I worry about the most: it can't be healthy constructing your identity around performance like that. I think he's got more going on in his head than he lets on. I worry about him sometimes.
I also find his combination of "feminine" characteristics (aegyo, greasiness, etc.) with more "masculine" ones (his muscles, his ability to take the lead) really, really fascinating. Kid's gender performance is so unique. I love him for it.
One last thing: his last name + the first part of his first name are pronounced like the Korean word for tree (namu). Because of this, there are a lot of tree puns that people make involving his name, and one of his nicknames is "greasy tree." So if you see any tree references, they're talking about Woohyun.
+ Jang Dongwoo
dob: november 22, 1990
Jang Dongwoo is actually the most delightful person alive. This is the guy who has totally taken over my tumblr. I'm sure, if you follow me, you have noticed him by now, if only because of his current blue hairstyle. By all accounts he is the world's sweetest guy--I have heard not one negative word about him while spending way too much time reading up on these guys. The other guys occasionally make fun of him for being not all that bright, but I don't think that's the case--he is, I believe, plenty smart, it's just that he's very easily distracted, can't keep himself from moving around constantly, and prefers to look at the world in a straight-forward and simple way. Sometimes he zones out, too, but I think when he does pay attention he's plenty clever, he just isn't one to analyze things.
He can dance like nobody's business. Apparently he was originally supposed to be the dancer of the group, but when he was in the center of the line he brought the level up too high (the other boys couldn't keep up with his intensity) and so they went with Hoya instead as the main dancer. But I just like Dongwoo's style better: I could watch him dance all day. He can't sit still, either: he's constantly in motion, dancing silly dances or running around the room. He's the most tactile of all the boys: he's always hugging one of the other guys or (hilariously) grabbing their butts or whatever. Touchy, touchy, touchy.
They call him the 999-dimensional one (apparently a 4-d personality is a description of someone who's strange, so 999-d means he's REALLY strange) because he's really quirky. He carries around so much stuff in his backpack, and one of the best bits they do on variety shows is "going through Dongwoo's backpack and making fun of the random stuff he carries around" (and it is so very random). But he takes it in stride, because he's incredibly good-natured, with a fantastic laugh--he laughs a lot--and is friends with everyone. The boys describe him as the mom of the group, and he seems to genuinely care about each of them. He's laid back and doesn't complain and is just completely guileless. He is like joy incarnate--so very, very much joy spilling all over the place--but he also has the most epic cry face. I lovelovelovelovelove him. No one else brings me as much joy as Dongwoo does. He is made of sweetness and light and laughter and being wonderful and he may be the only perfect person on the planet.
I realize he's not the most conventionally attractive guy; I've seen some people calling him ugly, even. And up until recently I think his looks were pretty much irrelevant. But in the comeback trailer up at the top and "The Chaser" promos, I think he's gotten just so hot. So hot. I basically think he's the hottest thing on two legs. Wow. Okay, Dongwoo. Keep up with that.
Also, I am loving the hell out of his blue hair right now. Most guys would look totally ridiculous with hair like that; he looks awesome.
+ Kim Sunggyu
dob: april 28, 1989
Grandpa Gyu confuses the heck out of me. I keep saying everyone say that he's a good guy and an excellent leader, but from watching Sesame Player and some of the earlier episodes of Ranking King, he seems like he can be a jerk? He's not very nice to Sungjong, which breaks my heart because HOW COULD YOU BE MEAN TO SUNGJONG? People say this is just for the cameras, and I sincerely hope that's true, it's just that I don't feel like I get to see him be the person people keep telling me he is as much as I would like to. It's all very confusing to me.
Okay, forget all that. I have reached the point where I love Gyu madly. I don't know what happened, and I do sometimes think he's too hard on Sungjongand not supportive enough of Sungyeol but everyone has weaknesses and his strengths have won me over.
He clearly takes his leadership responsibilities very seriously, and I respect that. He works the other boys really hard, but he also seems to work just as hard at the dancing/singing/whatever, so that's good. He seems pretty myopic to me: totally focused on honing Infinite and making it the best. He can sing very, very well, with great range, and he works hella hard at it AND HIS VOICE IS SO BEAUTIFUL IT SOMETIMES MAKES ME CRY. He came to Woollim not to be a kpop idol, but because his favorite band, Nell, is with Woollim. Nell is this indie-rock band, completely different from kpop in general and Infinite's music in particular. And pre-Infinite, he was in a rock band that played very different music than what Infinite is putting out there. So I think Leader Gyu's got a lot of angst that he carries around with him over the fact that his path isn't leading where he wanted it to. Despite that, he seems completely committed to making Infinite work, and I respect that.
Still, I just haven't been charmed by him as often as I have by the rest of the boys, and I can't shake the feeling that he's too mean to the others on variety shows sometimes (even on Weekly Idol, where he is hilariously persecuted by everyone, he listed all of Sungyeol's bad qualities in a way that struck me as not-kind move: Sungyeol has notoriously low self-confidence so why would anyone do that to him on television? Things like that rub me the wrong way. Though I can understand if he was wanting to strike back because he was hurting from what they were saying to him. I just wish he hadn't taken it out on Sungyeol--if he'd said that about literally any of the other boys, I would have just gone with it. But I'm protective of Sungyeol). But the other guys don't seem to hold it against him, which is why I remain confused.
He has quite a dry sense of humor that pops up at unexpected times. HE CAN BE THE MOST HILARIOUS. All-time favorite Sunggyu moments was in Sesame Player when he looks like he's fallen asleep on the bus and Sungyeol says that they should just leave him there, and without opening his eyes, he says, "I hear everything." It's such a leader-parent kind of moment that I died. He also has more of these moments on Ranking King. The episodes with the ghosts were GOLD as far as Sunggyu goes. Basically: he can be really hilarious.
Honestly, this performance won me over to liking him more than anything else I've ever seen him do. Because it's so incredibly out of character: it's poppy and silly and so, so much more like something Woohyun would do. Remembering him screaming in a "hardcore" rock band back in high school, this seems even more hilarious. I can only imagine how his friends from back home reacted to it. Every single thing is out of character. Every single thing. And yet he sells it--he goes for it all the way, though there's humor in his approach as well, like he's aware of how out of character it is. I like a person with a sense of humor who can make fun of his own personae. I love this performance.If he keeps up with this sort of thing, he'll win me over completely.
AND HE HAS. I have come to love this squishy little hamster to death. He takes things so very seriously and is so much more conservative than some of the other guys about age roles and things like that, but he is just the best. He can be charming as hell, he can be totally ridiculous in a 'how do you expect me to take you seriously?' kind of way, and he can even sometimes be really sexy. I loff him now. And I am glad.
Interlude: Friendships
(or: some feelings about the two of the biggest ships in English-speaking fandom)
I want to take a brief moment to touch on a couple of relationships between the boys that I find interesting, too.
+ Myungsoo and Sungyeol
source
Myungsoo and Sungyeol are BROS, and theirs is my favorite friendship. They're best friends, and apparently have been since before the debut. I find this adorable, especially because you might not expect it, given how different they are. They're kind of the typical guy bffs in that they like to shove each other around a lot and tease each other and pretend like they hate each other. But they'll spin on a dime and say they love each other, too. What I find so cute I can hardly stand it is that when Myungsoo gets clingy (Myungsoo is extremely clingy--Woohyun does fan service, Dongwoo is just a touchy person, but Myungsoo is clingy) and attaches himself to Sungyeol's back or throws an arm over his shoulder or starts playing with his hair (Myungsoo loves to play with people's hair), Sungyeol doesn't pay the slightest bit of attention, just carrying on with whatever else he's doing and letting Myungsoo treat him like a teddy bear.
The other great thing about them is that Myungsoo finds Sungyeol hilarious. Sungyeol is a giant ham, so he often acts like an idiot for the cameras, and whenever he does, Myungsoo is always the one laughing the hardest. Oftentimes it's more fun to watch Myungsoo watching Sungyeol than it is to watch Sungyeol. While Myungsoo isn't the ice prince his L personae indicates, he can be distant and zone out a lot, so the fact that he's always so there when Sungyeol is the center of his attention makes me so happy. He laughs and smiles more when Sungyeol is around, and the fact that Myungsoo appreciates Sungyeol helps my prince's self-esteem, I think.
Lately, though, there seems to be a bit of a distance between them (which I and others like me have been exploiting for the sake of angsty fanfic), and I can't help but assume that this is because Myungsoo's acting career is taking off and Sungyeol's isn't. Maybe that's not even true, but it feels like the case. I hope they're okay, because I am overly invested in their everything. Basically I could watch them just exist in a room together and be happy. BOYS. ♥♥♥
+ Woohyun and Sunggyu
source
The other relationship that fascinates me is Woohyun and Sunggyu's. This is the biggest ship in fandom right now, and I can't say I don't understand why. Their relationship is...complicated. That's the way it looks to me. They're the two lead vocalists, and I don't think anyone would disagree with me when I say that that probably meant there was a ton of competativeness between them during their trainee days. Sunggyu has admitted that he didn't like Woohyun at first, but he says now he trusts him more than anyone. I can so easily see how their personalities would clash: Sunggyu is much quieter and more professional, completely focused on his career, where Woohyun is much more flamboyant, almost? He's excessive in everything and doesn't know when to drop things.
And yet now they appear to be incredibly close. They're roommates and have been since the beginning. Woohyun walks around saying things like, "A Kim Sunggyu without a Nam Woohyun is like chopsticks without a spoon, a thread without a needle, a kite without string." They're always with the fanservice, touching and making eyes at each other and just always pairing up for everything. Woohyun is undeniably his right hand, his lieutenant, the second leader of the group. I think he balances him out as a leader in a really, really amazing way. (I have a LOT of feelings about Woohyun-as-Sunggyu's-right-hand. Do not even get me started.)
And yet that seems too simple to me. I don't think their relationship is as easy as, say, Hoya and Dongwoo's (known as the married couple because they just have this lovely, easy friendship). Sunggyu is the leader, for one thing, and I just can't believe that sometimes things with Woohyun aren't some sort of power struggle. I bet they fight a lot and it gets ugly. And yet their closeness and trust remains. I can't help but wonder how much of their friendship is for the fans and how much of it is genuine, because sometimes it's hard to tell. They seem very dependant upon each other, but I don't know if they're all hearts and smiles about that or if they sometimes resent it/chafe against it. I read lots of fic about them because there's so many different sides to their relationship that I find enthralling and I'll read all these fics that approach that relationship from completely different angles and yet they all seem realistic to me. Basically: they're complicated and bottomless and I do not know what to make of them but I know that I love them madly.
Part IV: INFINITE
(or: who they are as a group)
source
And I think another aspect of my affection for them is that they are, in a lot of ways, the underdogs. Their entertainment company isn't one of the Big 3 that dominate Korean music and who have tons of money to promote their groups. From what I understand, they're Woollim's only big pop group (they also have Nell, who I think I'd like if I got into them a bit more and are obviously very respected, but they're not pop, they're indie rock, and that's a whole 'nother ball game, and they used to have Epik High who were this indie hip-hop group, but they've gone their separate ways) and I get the impression there's just a lot of pressure on them. It makes me feel very protective of them. I think no one expected them to do very well, and yet they have, and it feels like they've done so through sheer tenacity and hard work, and I love that.
I've also read that they're basically keeping Woollim afloat because Woollim has lots of money issues (meaning: they never have enough) and Infinite's the only one bringing in much revenue. They lived in this crappy old house for 3 years, the seven of them and a manager, and the place was a giant mess (especially with 8 guys living sharing one bathroom) and moldy and with a leaky roof. The CEO promised them they could move if they got a song in the top 10, and then when they did that he changed it up on them and told them they had to get the top 3 (I get the impression I would not be fond of this guy). They reached number 1 with "Be Mine," and the apartment they moved into once they accomplished that is very, very nice and they finally have two bathrooms and an actual closet.
They still aren't as big as some of the other groups, but they've carved a niche with their sound: an Infinite song sounds like an Infinite song. They also have the best choreographer in kpop (whoever this guy is, he is brilliant) and they are my favorite dancing band as well. I could watch them dance forever.
I also get the feeling that most of them didn't get into this to be idols (Woohyun and Sungjong aside, possibly, but that's speculation). They had other interests--Hoya and Dongwoo just wanted to dance, I think, and Sungyeol wanted to act, and Sunggyu wanted to make great music, and I still haven't figured out what the heck it is that Myungsoo wants--but they ended up in this place, with these guys in this group. And all of them have worked so hard (when I think about how hard kpop idols work, how little free time they get, how little they get to rest, I honestly get a bit upset, so I won't go there now) and been gracious and humble, and it's lovely. Their relationships seem like sibling ones; I know they have to fight and annoy each other, and since they live together and are together more than people are with their actual siblings, there's no way they do't grate on each others' nerves, but they also really believe in the family that is Infinite, and that's terribly sweet.
Conclusion
(or: actually, I don't just treat them like eye candy)
Now, remember how cute they are:
source
Awwww!
But here's the thing: for all that drooling I did way up there at the top of this post, 90% of the time I don't really look at these kids that way? I feel like I've gotten to know them a bit through their variety show appearances, and I'm very, very fond of the ones I'm fond of. But most of the time it's in a big sisterly way. Like, I want to be their noona and look after them and take care of them and give them advice and tease them and stuff. Like I said: not hugely into their music, but I'm proud of them for working so very, very hard (it's amazing to me how hard Korean entertainers work. Their work ethic is insane). But then that 10% of the happens: they'll come out with a video that's all about how hot they are and I'm like, "OH YEAH THEY'RE ATTRACTIVE, TOO."
Anyway, these boys make me happy. I'm pleased that they were my introduction to kpop and that they are, from what I can tell, having a hell of a lot of fun making music and dancing together. I hope they keep it up for as long as it makes them happy.
And now if you're curious, here are their music videos (I actually included the dance versions of a couple of them because they're better than the actual videos):
The Chaser
Be Mine
Paradise
BTD (Before the Dawn)
Lately (White Confession)
Nothing's Over
She's Back
Come Back Again
This is a post about these kids:
source
Awww! Aren't they cute? Well, forget all about that.
(or: they're sexy and they know it)
aerintine because she enables me. Ahem.LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE FEMALE GAZE.
Gah, this is so over-the-top in its invitation to look at the beautiful boys and drool over how sexy they are. Like, it's so over-the-top that I'm almost ashamed for falling for it. Except that I am not even a little bit ashamed because THESE BOYS ARE REALLY HOT and they are playing to my gaze and there is no room for shame here in being a woman and having a sex drive and thinking guys are hot. I love it.
(or: this part will only be relevant to my friends who were wondering what happened to my sanity)
source
Y'all, in the last couple of weeks of falling for this silly little kpop band, I have sometimes wondered whether it actually makes sense to be this obsessed with a band whose music I care nothing about.
I don't know what I'm trying to say except that music fandom has always pretty much eluded me. Until I accidentally tripped into Infinite because Myungsoo was in Shut Up! Flower Boy Band (which I would pay y'all to watch: IT IS SO GOOD) and I ended up watching clips of Sesame Player and now I've worked my way through You Are My Oppa and Sesame Player and now I'm watching Birth of a Family. And I just love these boys. They are just so hilarious and cute and adorable and they love each other so much. And they're talented. (And, all of a sudden, extremely hot. But more on that anon.)
But I still don't really care about the music? Some of their songs have grown on me, some of them I don't care about. But I'm never going to be into kpop for the music. That just isn't going to happen. I don't listen to Top 40 here for a reason--while I do love a good really poppy pop song (yes, One Direction, I think "What Makes You Beautiful" is hella fun), I mostly like music involving actual instruments (which is NOT to slam on electronically-produced stuff--it can be brilliant, it just usually isn't for me). I love rock. I love the blues (love the blues). I love bluegrass and more of the stripped-down country/Americana/folk. I love singer-songwriter stuff. I love classical and orchestral music. I love church music, from Sacred Harp up through Rachmaninoff's Vespers. (I wish I liked jazz, since it's apparently music for smart people, but I guess I'm not that smart because I don't like it.) That's not going to change any time soon, I don't think. I may like to bop around the house to ABBA sometimes, but mostly I'm going to stick to other types of things.
But. I have to admit that I am in kpop fandom now. It's happened.
(or: a brief introduction to the boys being supremely silly that proves why you should find them endearing)
I've thought that Myungsoo is beautiful since the first episode of SUFBB. And I was really taken with him when I watched clips of him on youtube because, as I said in another post, I have this huge soft spot for people who are trying to be cool and just aren't. But I didn't really expect to be taken with the rest of the boys, but I have been.
So let me share with you this video again, and I will talk about it and how much I love these kids.
Things I love about this video:
+ The fact that they're having a dance party to their own music in a hotel room in Singapore. Because of course they are.
+ Sungjongie looks adorable in that hoodie that's flopping around everywhere.
+ MYUNGSOO IS SO RIDICULOUS. Like, making fun of himself and his tendency to look ridiculous when he's dancing and his tendency to fall over and the fact that gravity loves Myungsoo the most. People who can make fun of themselves: my favorite. And I love that he's not laughing out loud at himself: he's weirdly intense in a very Myungsoo sort of way even in this moment of supreme silliness. What a weird kid. I love it.
+ Dongwoo's laugh. BEST LAUGH IN THE WORLD. He just bubbles over with joy.
+ Dongwoo looks so cute in his glasses! Awwww!
+ OMG WOOHYUN YOU ARE SUCH A FLIRT. I seriously think there has never been a guy who so much wants to present himself for the female gaze. He is always playing to the ladies, always flirting. They call him "greasy" for a reason. Not that I'm complaining because:
+ WOOHYUN HAS SOME ABS. And they are pretty.
+ And his arms aren't bad, either. (I think of Buffy: "Did you see his arms? Those are some good arms to have.")
+ And, okay, his butt looks great, too.
+ Sungjong attacking him with the pillows because he is the most ridiculous. He totally deserves it.
+ Sunggyu not even making it it through more than one move before the guys all mock him to death. These kids love to persecute their leader, and it is glorious.
+ Hoya's dance. Hoya and I have some issues (see below), but his dance is hysterical to me. What a goof. We don't get to see this side of Hoya often enough, imo.
+ They don't remember to call Myungsoo "L" until halfway through the video.
+ Myungsoo tripping over the bed. THIS CHILD.
+ Hoya's accent when he speaks English that doesn't sound like any other accent I've ever heard and is so adorable it hurts.
The only thing I do not like about this video: Sungyeol isn't in it, because he was sick that night. I can only imagine how much better it would be if he were. Watch this video of ridiculousness and let your imagination run wild.
(or: way too many words and feelings about these people I have never met)
And now for some thoughts on each of the boys. I'm going in reverse-age-order because everyone always goes in age order and I want to shake things up a bit.
+ Lee Sungjong
dob: september 3, 1993
source
LEMON CANDY LEE SUNGJONG. This kid's hips do not lie! Sungjongie started out so adorable I almost can't stand it but has transitioned into being THE FIERCE ONE. He's the baby (maknae) of the group, and to quote this invaluable post, he enjoys girl group dances and being a brat. Actually, less of a brat these days: he's finally grown up and has that androgynous beautiful boy thing going on. He's very pious, which is sweet, and loveslovesloves girl group dances. And kills at them. I don't know how his ass does what it does. SERIOUSLY? He apparently learns the dances after watching them like twice and then makes his hyungs watch him do them and tell him that he's better than the original performers. HA. He also apparently told Sunggyu early on after they first met, "Hyung, a face like mine is rare." He's incredibly aware of his own attractiveness to the point almost of vanity, but it's not obnoxious the way it could be.
As an aside, my all-time favorite Sungjong-is-pretty moment was in Sesame Player when the boys have to clean the dorm because they're told that a girl band is coming to visit. The guys all start speculating on who it is, and Sunggyu interrupts and says, "It doesn't matter who comes. Sungjong is probably prettier." And Sungjong does this half matter-of-fact agreement/half preening face, and it is GLORIOUS.
He takes out his frustration with his hyungs (specifically Sunggyu) by beating up on his teddy bears. And he needs to do it, too; part of the whole kpop boy band ~thing~ is that the maknae is everyone's bitch, and while most of the other boys don't treat Sungjong this way, Sunggyu does quite often and sometimes the other boys pile on, and poor Jongie gets frustrated and who can blame him? Poor kid. I actually got mad at the other guys in a couple of their variety shows for the way they treat him. But apparently he's gotten really scary when he's angry. Recently they did something that made him mad and he stormed off and sat in the van without them and they all came out and crowded around and were trying to figure out how to apologize and he leaned out of the car and yells SHUT UP in banmal and now they're all terrified of him. I love it.
He's the only member of the band with anything like dignity and his default reaction to everything these days seems to be to roll his eyes while the others act like idiots. I would love to watch a show where he offers commentary on his hyungs, because I know he would be snarky as hell and it would be glorious. The other boys will be acting like fools (as they do) and he's just sitting there with his legs crossed being totally unimpressed.
He also seems less comfortable with his effeminate reputation these days. He never seemed to take issue with it before (talking about his 24 inch waist and doing girl group dances at the drop of a hat), but now he seems intent on proving that he is MANLY (the other guys all agree that he is). My suspicion is that this is because he's growing up and wanting to be an adult, and he seems to somehow view this as going hand-in-hand with being more "manly." He said on a recent variety show that he doesn't really like to do girl group dances anymore. I don't know if he doesn't enjoy them anymore (doubtful) or if he just doesn't enjoy performing them in front of people and what that signifies. I imagine it does get annoying to be told you're a pretty little girl all the time, but I hope he finds a comfortable middle ground, because I really think his androgyny is one of his strong points. [Basically, I enjoy his gender performance. Though not as much as Woohyun's, which is more subtle but way more about juxtaposition.]
He can flip on his "I am a sex god worship me" mode during performances, and it's kind of jaw-dropping. Despite his effimenence and love of girl group dances and everyone's assumptions, he is not gay--he likes girls very much (chubby ones, actually). He seems to absolutely adore any kind of animal (I've yet to see him encounter an animal that he doesn't take into his heart immediately--on one variety show they locked him in a room full of frogs and he was totally happy). He's fabulous.
I miss his BTD hair like I miss a person. At the time he was too young to really objectify properly without me feeling guilty, but if he was to bring that hair back? All bets would be off. ALL BETS WOULD BE OFF.
+ Kim Myungsoo (L)
dob: march 13, 1992
I already have a post just word-vomiting about Myungsoo/L, but I'll briefly go over my feelings about him again.
So initially I became aware of him as a giant dorky spazz, because I watched clips from Sesame Player first, and that's who he is in that show. This speaks to me, obviously. He's physically awkward, has the world's dorkiest laugh, makes the derpiest faces on the planet (so much so that I am actually running a tumblr blog dedicated to his derpiness), zones out completely a lot of the time, and is just plain weird.
But then I went back and watched You Are My Oppa, in which he sits around sullenly for most of the show. I kind of love this, too, him trying to be a sullen, petulant ice prince because I love people who just want everyone to go away and leave them alone because I am often like this. I think most of the time this is a front, and that he was really trying to create this personae that he'd either decided to create or been assigned by the company (my suspicions: the latter). His personae is ~mysterious~ and ~cool~ and that's what he was going for on that show and most of the time on stage. It's probably a good thing for him: the way he's able to separate who he really is (spazzy yet introverted) from who he's supposed to be as an idol (ice prince). This is where the whole not-as-cool-as-he-wants-to-appear-to-be comes in.
And yes, he is the introverted one. He's by far the calmest of the boys (Hoya aside), and sometimes he does just seem like he wants to sit in the corner and chill while the rest of them freak out. This may sound strange, but I actually worry about him because I just know he doesn't get enough alone time, and we all know introverts need that. I think the idol thing was never really part of his plan--it's not really suited to his personality, really--but he's made this decision and he's going to work very hard and take criticism silently and just do what he can. He's very determined, and I appreciate that. He works very, very hard; there's absolutely no doubt that his his the voice that has improved the most since the boys debuted. He isn't ever going to be the best singer of the group (Woohyun and Sunggyu have so much natural talent that no one else could ever touch them), but he's come really far, and I'm very proud of him. He also seems to be working equally hard on his acting career, and I think he'll make a perfectly good little actor someday, though I imagine his range will always be limited.
In other Myungsoo-is-a-dork news, he loveslovesloves romance mangas, nunchucking, the color black, and he's something of a fashion disaster when left to his own devices. He admits that he becomes easily obsessed (and he's the CLINGIEST KID ON EARTH OMG), and I can so see that. He loves photography and seems to take it quite seriously. He also seems to me to be quite uncomfortable with the attention that gets paid to his looks--I think he finds it pretty irrelevant about himself, honestly. I like that about him.
Oh, crap, I forgot to talk about his face. His face is a big deal, okay? He's the visual in the band, which literally means he's there to be good-looking. He could have easily coasted on his looks, but instead, he works hard as I've said, and wants to make a contribution. I don't want to be all "poor him, he's so attractive," but it does have to get annoying to be told in EVERY INTERVIEW YOU EVER DO "Oh, you're so handsome." And for everyone to not expect much of you just because they assume you got what you have because of your face. And there's no doubt that his face is a work of art. But he wants to be more than that, and I love him for that.
And I blame him for everything. I blame him for getting me into kpop, I blame him for me having all of these feelings, I blame him for every problem in the world. It's all his fault. Jerk.
+ Lee Sungyeol
dob: august 27, 1991
Lee Sungyeol is my prince. In any other group on the planet, Dongwoo would be the weird one, but this band has Lee Sungyeol, and no one will ever be stranger than Sungyeollie. He's just incredibly weird, and I mean that in the best sense of the word. The others call him choding (elementary school kid) because he just gets into messes all the time, and it is the most adorable thing when he does.
He used to have the world's most adorable chipmunk cheeks, but he's losing his babyfat now, so they aren't as obvious. On the other hand, he has a very untoned stomach that he hasn't lost despite maturing, which I find ridiculously endearing. He's very, very emotional and cries at anything sentimental, which makes me love him (he seems to be stabalizing a bit, truthfully, which was to be expected, but he's still more emotional than any of the other guys but Dongwoo).
I totally fell in love with him in Sesame Player where he was so silly and lovable and has this really weird, throaty laugh that I love more than I can say. Then, recently and out of the blue, he went through a couple of weeks where he seemed to be really toned-down and low-key, and it was super-confusing. That said, confusing as it was, his behavior on the first two episodes of Ranking King was amazing--he clearly didn't care about anything that was going on and threw out snarky questions and comments here and there (asking Woohyun why he was shorter today--he wasn't wearing his lifts--and telling Sunggyu that he couldn't see his eyes. WONDERFUL BOY). He's always been the witty one, in an off-beat way, but he was so hella snarky those first few episodes of Ranking King that I almost died. He's since recovered most of his energy, though I do think his volume is a bit lower now than in the past, which I think is just a sign of maturity. He keeps talking about being more mature and having more confidence, so I think he's working quite hard at that. As hard as he can work, anyway.
There's no doubt in my mind that Sungyeol is the smartest one in this band. His strangeness might detract from that, but if you pay attention, he's obviously sharp as a whip--he's always throwing out insightful, witty comments. As we all know, I like smart people. But his mind is so different than anyone else's that you almost don't notice how smart he is.
I get angry on his behalf because he rarely gets many lines in the songs and very little face-time in videos, either. His problem is his lack of confidence--he's by no means a singer, but he can pull off more than he's trusted with when it's in the right range (look at the "Bangkok City" performance and you'd never know he has singing problems) and while the choreography looks different when he does it (he's so lanky with these long limbs that even though he knows all the moves, it just looks looser and less clean than when the other guys perform), he masters it well--but he doesn't believe that he can. So he messes up the notes more than the other guys when they're performing because he lets that lack of confidence trip him up. He gets the fewest lines BY FAR in the songs as a result. They often try to make up for it by letting him do more in the MV, which I appreciate. He's just far and away the most insecure one in the group, and though he covers that most of the time with his antics, I can still see it: I think he carries all those insecurities around with him. He's seemed a little more confident lately--he promised in his message on their latest EP that he was working on that, and I really hope he is. Basically I want to wrap him up in blankets and giving him good things to eat and tell him that he's wonderful.
This video pretty much encapsulates all of his issues, and I kind of teared up when I watched it. For once he's center-stage, but he can't trust that: he has to keep glancing back and getting reassurance from Leader Gyu that he's doing things right (Woohyun is oblivious, because of course he is, but this is one of those times when I think Sunggyu must be a really good leader, because he doesn't hesitate to offer that encouragement that Sungyeol needs).
One last thing and then I'll shut up about this kid: music/being an idol isn't his primary interest. He wants to act. He was in a sitcom for a while, but it seems from the outside looking in that he hasn't had much luck since then though he's still trying. I can't help but think that this is somehow tied to his lack of confidence, as is the fact that he was originally with SM (one of the Big Three entertainment companies) training to be an MC (which he would be great at, actually) before he made it over to Woollim somehow (still a bit unclear on how that happened). But that had to kind of feel like movie backwards. I really hope he gets some roles soon. I want him to have what he wants.
+ Lee Howon (Hoya)
dob: march 28, 1991
I have developed a few issues with Hoya. He's said some things about black people that, while I truly believe come from a place of ignorance in an attempt to be truly complimentary, are ridiculous enough that it's affected my affection for him. Somebody needs to sit him down and educate him. I know that things are different in a society that's much more homogenous, but really: his entire dance machine thing is one big appropriation of black culture and while I don't blame him for that (most of kpop is one big appropriation of black culture, but that's another topic, and a complex one), I do think that he has a responsibility to educate himself on this topic since that's what he's making his living off of it.
Anyway, that aside I'm pretty okay with him. He's the official dance machine of the group and is very good at it: he gets into the dancing, which is endearing. Has the world's most adorable accent when he speaks in English. He's known for having amazing instincts. He seems like a very gentle guy, which I greatly appreciate in a guy, especially because he's the manly-man of the group. He can be really sweet, but he also has a sharp tongue sometimes and they don't let him talk much in interviews because he has a very adult sense of humor. He's HILARIOUS when picking on Sunggyu.
He's even more quiet than Myungsoo can be, but he's more laid-back (Myungsoo has can be moody and probably a bit of a bitch--Hoya seems to just go with the flow most of the time). He has a really sweet smile.
And you have to respect him for making his dreams a reality. He dropped out of high school without his parents' permission to pursue his dancing dreams. I think they were very, very disappointed, but he worked hard and got into Infinite and has made good, and I'm sure they're incredibly proud of him now. I'm so glad he's been successful.
But mostly I only get excited about him when he interacts with the other boys (specifically Dongwoo and Sungjong--I would watch a TV show about him giving Sungjong piggyback rides and the way he kept cracking jokes on SP about how he and Dongwoo were filming We Got Married made me laugh). I couldn't possibly dislike anyone who loves Dongwoo and Sungjong as much as he does, because that means he has awesome taste. One of my all-time favorite moments from anyone in the band was when he was asked in a written interview how he was such good friends with Sungjong when they seem so different (they've been roommates for years), and his answer was: "Sungjongie is my matter of interest." I still grin when I think about that.
+ Nam Woohyun
dob: february 8, 1991
The first thing Woohyun wants you to notice about him is that is a very good-looking guy. And he has reason for this: I mean, he's hot! I love his nose. He has beautiful abs. He likes to show them off. I do not complain. He has a drawer full of skin care products and makeup, because of course he does. He can seem like a strutting peacock, but I think that covers up some insecurities and is more what he thinks he needs to be rather than what he really is (see below).
As I mention above, he is the world's biggest flirt. His main goal in life seems to be showing everyone just how much he loves the ladies and how much they love him. He's also a giant ham; he's always performing. He seems so very aware of what's expected of him as an idol and he's determined to give it. So he's definitely the most fanservice-y. And I think he thinks of himself as an idol before he does as a musician, despite the fact that he's one of the main vocalists of the group and has an awesome voice. They call him greasy, which means he's over-the-top with his fanservice, with his flirting, with his saying things to ingratiate himself with fans (talking about how he doesn't need a girlfriend because Inspirits are all his girlfriend, things like that). It's kind of like smarminess, but more pointed, I guess? I really don't think this has anything to do with who he really is away from the cameras--I think somehow early on he settled on that role (or someone settled on it for him) and now it's expected and so he still does it. Boy works hard and is absolutely committed. You could never say otherwise.
He can be an annoying troll, but mostly in an endearing way. And I think he's probably vain but manages to come off that way without really being arrogant? I don't know. He seems like a pretty good guy, and I find people who view their ultimate identity as that of performer really interesting, and he strikes me that way.
I've decided that he's basically the male version of Mini from Skins: totally building his identity around how he appears to others. He's lost a huge amount of weight since his trainee days--he used to have this adorable round face and be a bit chubby in a completely cute way, but he's honed his body down to reveal the abs of glory. I think he gets too skinny sometimes--you can see his ribs on occasion--and I worry that he doesn't take care of himself like he should. That he sees his body as something to be looked at rather than as something to serve him, you know?
I also know that he has to know that people call him greasy/a whore/whatever, and that has to affect him. I don't think he actually likes being the greasy one, but that is the role he's taken on, as I've said, and he definitely sells it. Honestly, his is the mental health I worry about the most: it can't be healthy constructing your identity around performance like that. I think he's got more going on in his head than he lets on. I worry about him sometimes.
I also find his combination of "feminine" characteristics (aegyo, greasiness, etc.) with more "masculine" ones (his muscles, his ability to take the lead) really, really fascinating. Kid's gender performance is so unique. I love him for it.
One last thing: his last name + the first part of his first name are pronounced like the Korean word for tree (namu). Because of this, there are a lot of tree puns that people make involving his name, and one of his nicknames is "greasy tree." So if you see any tree references, they're talking about Woohyun.
+ Jang Dongwoo
dob: november 22, 1990
Jang Dongwoo is actually the most delightful person alive. This is the guy who has totally taken over my tumblr. I'm sure, if you follow me, you have noticed him by now, if only because of his current blue hairstyle. By all accounts he is the world's sweetest guy--I have heard not one negative word about him while spending way too much time reading up on these guys. The other guys occasionally make fun of him for being not all that bright, but I don't think that's the case--he is, I believe, plenty smart, it's just that he's very easily distracted, can't keep himself from moving around constantly, and prefers to look at the world in a straight-forward and simple way. Sometimes he zones out, too, but I think when he does pay attention he's plenty clever, he just isn't one to analyze things.
He can dance like nobody's business. Apparently he was originally supposed to be the dancer of the group, but when he was in the center of the line he brought the level up too high (the other boys couldn't keep up with his intensity) and so they went with Hoya instead as the main dancer. But I just like Dongwoo's style better: I could watch him dance all day. He can't sit still, either: he's constantly in motion, dancing silly dances or running around the room. He's the most tactile of all the boys: he's always hugging one of the other guys or (hilariously) grabbing their butts or whatever. Touchy, touchy, touchy.
They call him the 999-dimensional one (apparently a 4-d personality is a description of someone who's strange, so 999-d means he's REALLY strange) because he's really quirky. He carries around so much stuff in his backpack, and one of the best bits they do on variety shows is "going through Dongwoo's backpack and making fun of the random stuff he carries around" (and it is so very random). But he takes it in stride, because he's incredibly good-natured, with a fantastic laugh--he laughs a lot--and is friends with everyone. The boys describe him as the mom of the group, and he seems to genuinely care about each of them. He's laid back and doesn't complain and is just completely guileless. He is like joy incarnate--so very, very much joy spilling all over the place--but he also has the most epic cry face. I lovelovelovelovelove him. No one else brings me as much joy as Dongwoo does. He is made of sweetness and light and laughter and being wonderful and he may be the only perfect person on the planet.
I realize he's not the most conventionally attractive guy; I've seen some people calling him ugly, even. And up until recently I think his looks were pretty much irrelevant. But in the comeback trailer up at the top and "The Chaser" promos, I think he's gotten just so hot. So hot. I basically think he's the hottest thing on two legs. Wow. Okay, Dongwoo. Keep up with that.
Also, I am loving the hell out of his blue hair right now. Most guys would look totally ridiculous with hair like that; he looks awesome.
+ Kim Sunggyu
dob: april 28, 1989
Okay, forget all that. I have reached the point where I love Gyu madly. I don't know what happened, and I do sometimes think he's too hard on Sungjong
He clearly takes his leadership responsibilities very seriously, and I respect that. He works the other boys really hard, but he also seems to work just as hard at the dancing/singing/whatever, so that's good. He seems pretty myopic to me: totally focused on honing Infinite and making it the best. He can sing very, very well, with great range, and he works hella hard at it AND HIS VOICE IS SO BEAUTIFUL IT SOMETIMES MAKES ME CRY. He came to Woollim not to be a kpop idol, but because his favorite band, Nell, is with Woollim. Nell is this indie-rock band, completely different from kpop in general and Infinite's music in particular. And pre-Infinite, he was in a rock band that played very different music than what Infinite is putting out there. So I think Leader Gyu's got a lot of angst that he carries around with him over the fact that his path isn't leading where he wanted it to. Despite that, he seems completely committed to making Infinite work, and I respect that.
He has quite a dry sense of humor that pops up at unexpected times. HE CAN BE THE MOST HILARIOUS. All-time favorite Sunggyu moments was in Sesame Player when he looks like he's fallen asleep on the bus and Sungyeol says that they should just leave him there, and without opening his eyes, he says, "I hear everything." It's such a leader-parent kind of moment that I died. He also has more of these moments on Ranking King. The episodes with the ghosts were GOLD as far as Sunggyu goes. Basically: he can be really hilarious.
Honestly, this performance won me over to liking him more than anything else I've ever seen him do. Because it's so incredibly out of character: it's poppy and silly and so, so much more like something Woohyun would do. Remembering him screaming in a "hardcore" rock band back in high school, this seems even more hilarious. I can only imagine how his friends from back home reacted to it. Every single thing is out of character. Every single thing. And yet he sells it--he goes for it all the way, though there's humor in his approach as well, like he's aware of how out of character it is. I like a person with a sense of humor who can make fun of his own personae. I love this performance.
AND HE HAS. I have come to love this squishy little hamster to death. He takes things so very seriously and is so much more conservative than some of the other guys about age roles and things like that, but he is just the best. He can be charming as hell, he can be totally ridiculous in a 'how do you expect me to take you seriously?' kind of way, and he can even sometimes be really sexy. I loff him now. And I am glad.
(or: some feelings about the two of the biggest ships in English-speaking fandom)
I want to take a brief moment to touch on a couple of relationships between the boys that I find interesting, too.
+ Myungsoo and Sungyeol
source
Myungsoo and Sungyeol are BROS, and theirs is my favorite friendship. They're best friends, and apparently have been since before the debut. I find this adorable, especially because you might not expect it, given how different they are. They're kind of the typical guy bffs in that they like to shove each other around a lot and tease each other and pretend like they hate each other. But they'll spin on a dime and say they love each other, too. What I find so cute I can hardly stand it is that when Myungsoo gets clingy (Myungsoo is extremely clingy--Woohyun does fan service, Dongwoo is just a touchy person, but Myungsoo is clingy) and attaches himself to Sungyeol's back or throws an arm over his shoulder or starts playing with his hair (Myungsoo loves to play with people's hair), Sungyeol doesn't pay the slightest bit of attention, just carrying on with whatever else he's doing and letting Myungsoo treat him like a teddy bear.
The other great thing about them is that Myungsoo finds Sungyeol hilarious. Sungyeol is a giant ham, so he often acts like an idiot for the cameras, and whenever he does, Myungsoo is always the one laughing the hardest. Oftentimes it's more fun to watch Myungsoo watching Sungyeol than it is to watch Sungyeol. While Myungsoo isn't the ice prince his L personae indicates, he can be distant and zone out a lot, so the fact that he's always so there when Sungyeol is the center of his attention makes me so happy. He laughs and smiles more when Sungyeol is around, and the fact that Myungsoo appreciates Sungyeol helps my prince's self-esteem, I think.
Lately, though, there seems to be a bit of a distance between them (which I and others like me have been exploiting for the sake of angsty fanfic), and I can't help but assume that this is because Myungsoo's acting career is taking off and Sungyeol's isn't. Maybe that's not even true, but it feels like the case. I hope they're okay, because I am overly invested in their everything. Basically I could watch them just exist in a room together and be happy. BOYS. ♥♥♥
+ Woohyun and Sunggyu
source
The other relationship that fascinates me is Woohyun and Sunggyu's. This is the biggest ship in fandom right now, and I can't say I don't understand why. Their relationship is...complicated. That's the way it looks to me. They're the two lead vocalists, and I don't think anyone would disagree with me when I say that that probably meant there was a ton of competativeness between them during their trainee days. Sunggyu has admitted that he didn't like Woohyun at first, but he says now he trusts him more than anyone. I can so easily see how their personalities would clash: Sunggyu is much quieter and more professional, completely focused on his career, where Woohyun is much more flamboyant, almost? He's excessive in everything and doesn't know when to drop things.
And yet now they appear to be incredibly close. They're roommates and have been since the beginning. Woohyun walks around saying things like, "A Kim Sunggyu without a Nam Woohyun is like chopsticks without a spoon, a thread without a needle, a kite without string." They're always with the fanservice, touching and making eyes at each other and just always pairing up for everything. Woohyun is undeniably his right hand, his lieutenant, the second leader of the group. I think he balances him out as a leader in a really, really amazing way. (I have a LOT of feelings about Woohyun-as-Sunggyu's-right-hand. Do not even get me started.)
And yet that seems too simple to me. I don't think their relationship is as easy as, say, Hoya and Dongwoo's (known as the married couple because they just have this lovely, easy friendship). Sunggyu is the leader, for one thing, and I just can't believe that sometimes things with Woohyun aren't some sort of power struggle. I bet they fight a lot and it gets ugly. And yet their closeness and trust remains. I can't help but wonder how much of their friendship is for the fans and how much of it is genuine, because sometimes it's hard to tell. They seem very dependant upon each other, but I don't know if they're all hearts and smiles about that or if they sometimes resent it/chafe against it. I read lots of fic about them because there's so many different sides to their relationship that I find enthralling and I'll read all these fics that approach that relationship from completely different angles and yet they all seem realistic to me. Basically: they're complicated and bottomless and I do not know what to make of them but I know that I love them madly.
(or: who they are as a group)
source
And I think another aspect of my affection for them is that they are, in a lot of ways, the underdogs. Their entertainment company isn't one of the Big 3 that dominate Korean music and who have tons of money to promote their groups. From what I understand, they're Woollim's only big pop group (they also have Nell, who I think I'd like if I got into them a bit more and are obviously very respected, but they're not pop, they're indie rock, and that's a whole 'nother ball game, and they used to have Epik High who were this indie hip-hop group, but they've gone their separate ways) and I get the impression there's just a lot of pressure on them. It makes me feel very protective of them. I think no one expected them to do very well, and yet they have, and it feels like they've done so through sheer tenacity and hard work, and I love that.
I've also read that they're basically keeping Woollim afloat because Woollim has lots of money issues (meaning: they never have enough) and Infinite's the only one bringing in much revenue. They lived in this crappy old house for 3 years, the seven of them and a manager, and the place was a giant mess (especially with 8 guys living sharing one bathroom) and moldy and with a leaky roof. The CEO promised them they could move if they got a song in the top 10, and then when they did that he changed it up on them and told them they had to get the top 3 (I get the impression I would not be fond of this guy). They reached number 1 with "Be Mine," and the apartment they moved into once they accomplished that is very, very nice and they finally have two bathrooms and an actual closet.
They still aren't as big as some of the other groups, but they've carved a niche with their sound: an Infinite song sounds like an Infinite song. They also have the best choreographer in kpop (whoever this guy is, he is brilliant) and they are my favorite dancing band as well. I could watch them dance forever.
I also get the feeling that most of them didn't get into this to be idols (Woohyun and Sungjong aside, possibly, but that's speculation). They had other interests--Hoya and Dongwoo just wanted to dance, I think, and Sungyeol wanted to act, and Sunggyu wanted to make great music, and I still haven't figured out what the heck it is that Myungsoo wants--but they ended up in this place, with these guys in this group. And all of them have worked so hard (when I think about how hard kpop idols work, how little free time they get, how little they get to rest, I honestly get a bit upset, so I won't go there now) and been gracious and humble, and it's lovely. Their relationships seem like sibling ones; I know they have to fight and annoy each other, and since they live together and are together more than people are with their actual siblings, there's no way they do't grate on each others' nerves, but they also really believe in the family that is Infinite, and that's terribly sweet.
(or: actually, I don't just treat them like eye candy)
Now, remember how cute they are:
source
Awwww!
But here's the thing: for all that drooling I did way up there at the top of this post, 90% of the time I don't really look at these kids that way? I feel like I've gotten to know them a bit through their variety show appearances, and I'm very, very fond of the ones I'm fond of. But most of the time it's in a big sisterly way. Like, I want to be their noona and look after them and take care of them and give them advice and tease them and stuff. Like I said: not hugely into their music, but I'm proud of them for working so very, very hard (it's amazing to me how hard Korean entertainers work. Their work ethic is insane). But then that 10% of the happens: they'll come out with a video that's all about how hot they are and I'm like, "OH YEAH THEY'RE ATTRACTIVE, TOO."
Anyway, these boys make me happy. I'm pleased that they were my introduction to kpop and that they are, from what I can tell, having a hell of a lot of fun making music and dancing together. I hope they keep it up for as long as it makes them happy.
And now if you're curious, here are their music videos (I actually included the dance versions of a couple of them because they're better than the actual videos):
The Chaser
Be Mine
Paradise
BTD (Before the Dawn)
Lately (White Confession)
Nothing's Over
She's Back
Come Back Again