exchange thoughts

[lirazel]

I've been seeing a lot of discussion on my flist reading page about fannish exchanges and people having really terrible experiences with them and it makes me so sad! Apparently there are a bunch of people out there with really terrible behavior who are ruining exchanges for other people, enough so that fans avoid specific exchanges or even exchanges in general even though they enjoy them in theory.


I myself have never had those kinds of negative experiences with exchanges. I have often received fic that was kind of meh, but it doesn't bother me much--I am extraordinarily picky about fic anyway, so it's no surprise that sometimes people don't write stuff that knocks my socks off!--but I have always tried to be gracious when I comment: to thank them for writing for me, to find a few things in the fic that I genuinely do love. I think I have done a competent job with this. I always want to make my writer feel appreciated because I genuinely love the gift economy so much! I love that someone else loves this fandom I love enough to write for it! There's so much to celebrate even if the fic didn't work for me!

I remember when I first started participating in exchanges lo these many years ago (2009ish? Maybe?), I was disappointed in the fics I received and I was (inwardly!) like, "Exchanges are a disappointment!"

But somehow I managed to shift my focus from receiving to writing and started to view exchanges primarily as mechanisms that push me to write things I would not otherwise write. Once I started looking at it that way, all my disappointment evaporated, and I still just flat-out enjoy exchanges.


But after hearing some of y'all's experiences, I don't blame you for your negative feelings about exchanges! Y'all have dealt with some crap!


I am interested in knowing whether any of you think there are some administrative things that could cut down on this kind of bad behavior. Are there things that those running the exchange could do differently that would make a difference?

Or is this, to your mind, an entirely attitude-based problem, just a case of people being jerks? I am genuinely interested in your thoughts about this!

Alternately, you can complain here about bad exchange behavior or tell me about how much you love exchanges or a specific great experience you've had with one!


I myself love them--I just really, really love how I always end up writing something I never would have written under my own steam. I've written some of my very favorite pieces for exchanges! Even some that didn't get much attention comment-wise just make me so happy! (For instance, my Seraphina fic has never had a wide readership, but I love that fic! I'm so glad I wrote it!)

Comments

[firecat]

I haven't had bad experiences with exchanges either, except ones that were my own fault (wasn't mindful enough and hit someone's DNW, ouch), and the occasional whingey feeling when my fic didn't get as much attention as I wanted (which happens with fics outside exchanges too). I mean, yes, I've had recipients who didn't comment, and that's annoying. But I write for my own pleasure as well as to please the recipient, so if they don't comment, I'm still glad I wrote something. Also, I'm in awe of how much work has gone into making exchanges what they are, and all the effort people put out to run them and to make sure everyone has a gift (pinch hitters, man!). They make me feel hopeful about humanity, overall.

[likeadeuce]

I'm curious what kind of bad experiences people have had. . . Does it seem more like people being oblivious to norms or deliberately cruel?

like you, I've mostly always seen exchanges as a motivation to write something and on a very few occasions I've had a recipient not acknowledge my work, I've honestly gotten more than I've given out of the last few exchanges (ie I defaulted but still got great stories.)

[rekishi]

The only exchange I really ever did was Yuletide and *sigh* It was over a decade ago, but I really have to say that the YT chat soured me on the whole thing. I'm not sure if it's a case of mass hysteria or what, but ultimately it turned out not to be a good place to be especially year-round. Even if end of the year wouldn't be a terribly time for my anymore, I probably wouldn't do it.

I don't think that there's anything administrative anyone could do (aside from the fact that some of the new management were in that group...) though, it's just not my scene.

(And I do have deadline issues anyway, which is a contributing factor.)

[adriennefae]

I've been doing fewer exchanges lately, but that's less because of any particularly bad experience, and more because I have other things to do and want to prioritize my own ideas more so I'm only signing up for ones that either have themes I'm really interested in, or where someone requests something that I'm actively inspired to write. A major reason I do them is because having a deadline by which somebody else is expecting the thing to be done definitely helps motivate me to write stuff, but I'd prefer not to need that all the time.

[dirty_diana]

I also love exchanges - swapping things out of love! and generally have a good time. I run into the usual fun-reducing situations from time to time, like recipients who don't comment. But honestly I don't think exchanges - at least the ones we do here on dreamwidth - exactly suffer from a lack of rules, so I'm not sure *more* rules is necessarily the path to more fun. I think it's just like any activity with other people, sometimes the people will be irritating. But most of the time they'll be great, so it's just the risk you take to play.

And for gifts I'm usually very happy! I'm one of those schmoopy people who is just delighted someone made me something, lol. And I mostly stick to themed or freeform exchanges. Which I think provides generally clear expectations which people do their best to meet in their own style, and I appreciate that about those types of exchanges a lot.

[landofnowhere]

My experience with exchanges is very limited: I wrote a yuletide treat once, and then signed up for Purimgifts one year, didn't give any instructions, defaulted, and never commented on the fic I received (which was not a fandom I was super into, but had listed so that I could get a match, and used characters I didn't really know -- not a bad fic, but not one I had much to say about!).

The treat I wrote (which is my only fanfic on AO3) was well received and made me think that I should write more fanfic -- but I'm not sure if exchanges are the way to get into doing that.

[evewithanapple]

I'll admit, I've gone off exchanges in the past few years, but it's not really about anyone's behaviour - I just feel increasingly disconnected from fandom as a community. I guess I always have, in that my interests (even when I was small and not online) tended to diverge from what was popular. It wasn't even a conscious thing, my brain just seems wired to pick something that nobody else would/could notice or be invested in and make that my whole personality. So with exchanges, it's hard to find enough common fannish ground to be able to write for someone else. There's also the lag between signing up and actually getting/giving the fic, which I think comes down, again, to my interests being niche; if you're not in a community with a bunch of other people sharing enthusiasm for something, it's more likely to burn out faster.

None of the above applies to vidding, though - I love vidding exchanges. I find it a lot easier to vid for a fandom that isn't The Fandom Of My Heart than I do to write for one.

[chestnut_pod]

I really enjoy the phenomenon of the fannish charity auction, which I know is not an exchange, but which does serve the purpose of getting me to write and record things I otherwise wouldn't, for the benefit of another fan. The idea that that fannish labor is going to both a) hopefully make the recipient happy and b) make some larger contribution to the world makes me feel very keen!

Otherwise, I think I've only participated in two exchanges in the proper sense: Purimgifts twice or thrice, and Black is Beautiful back in 2021 (?). Both were fairly low-intensity, with short minimum lengths. Both were also, I think, relatively small compared to Yuletide, with its hundreds of participants. That relative lack of complexity and pressure probably did help make them better experiences for me, personally.

[pegasus143]

I think my exchange experience is pretty similar to yours -- my worst experiences being either "that was kinda meh" or "oops, there was a DNW there, but it's pretty obvious that it was an accident rather than something malicious on the side of the author". I think one thing that really helps is that exchanges are a two way street -- even if your assignment turned out to be a slog to write or your gift was kinda meh, you could still receive a really awesome gift or get some really positive responses to something you created.

The only rule that I think would help is one that a couple of the 10k-minimum exchanges have adopted, where you must include some sort of likes and/or prompts in your signup or linked letter. Having some idea of what my recip enjoys really helps the writing process go well! I assume this is less of an issue for people who do mainly freeform-matching exchanges, but since those tend to be on the smaller side, I have a harder time finding things to offer that other people are requesting.