One other thing, I think Buffy's attitude to Spike was probably just like Spike's attitude to Buffy pre-dream in Out of My Mind, except she didn't voice it: Spike called Buffy "Hello, cutie" in season 2 and "Hello, gorgeous" in season 4, but he also mocked her "shampoo commercial hair" and gave her nicknames like "Little Rebecca of Sunnyhell farm". He did think of her as attractive but I'm sure he told himself that she really wasn't his type.
Like, you know, "Yes, I can certainly see why some other guys/girls would find her/him attractive, but I'm really not into that kind of girl/guy!"
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Like, you know, "Yes, I can certainly see why some other guys/girls would find her/him attractive, but I'm really not into that kind of girl/guy!"