Ha, yeah. I think the writers are definitely trying to make him sympathetic with all the angsting, which sometimes backfires. But he doesn't have to be sympathetic to be well-developed. I can't say I always find Damon likable, but I'm always interested in his character arc.

I also balk at the idea of buying into the good!Stefan/bad!Damon dichotomy

Word. And in a way, it's similar to the false Angel/Spike dichotomy in BtVS fandom.