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THE LONGEST POST ABOUT SKINS IN THE HISTORY OF THE WOOOOOOORLLLLLLLLDDDDDDD
Basically I have rediscovered my love of this show. And my kiiiiiids! MY KIIIIIDS! SO MUCH LOVE. And I have many, many thinky thoughts, though how original they are, I could not tell you. Probably I won’t say anything you didn’t already know or think or whatever, but I know that I, for one, really enjoy reading other people agreeing with me, so I’m posting. BEWARE HUGES BLOCKS OF TEXT.
I had seriously forgotten how much Sid makes my heart hurt and how badly I want to wrap him in blankets and give him hot chocolate and tell him that everything's going to be all right. THAT POOR BOY. Seriously, nothing ever goes right for him. Life is just so hard for him and it just breaks my heart into little tiny pieces and I don't know what to do with myself. I just don't know.
But seriously, he and Michelle became my POV characters this watch-through. The first time I watched the show, I wasn't living it with the characters, I was just watching and enjoying everybody, and probably Cassie and Tony were the most dramatic characters so they were the ones I thought most about. But this time it was all about watching through Sid and Michelle. And Sid's exactly my kind of character--he screws up everything and is bad at everything and he's just a mess, and he's always outshined by Tony, who's ridiculously smart and good-looking and knows how to get what he wants. And Sid really does spend a lot of time wanting to be Tony, and honestly I think a lot of his feelings for Michelle come from that. So when he has that "I can't think of anything worse than being you!" moment in "Effy," it's this HUGE MOMENT for him, because he figures out what it is that he wants--he wants Cassie--and what he doesn't want--to be Tony. And even though I think the show could have done a better job of actually developing the Sid/Cassie relationship, I do ship it because she's the first thing, I think, he really wants for just himself that has nothing to do with anyone else.
And he assumes the worst about her when she goes away, and really, considering what he sees--her on a bed in lingerie with a naked guy--it's not an unreasonable assumption. But I'm trying to unpack the whole, "No, I don't trust you," thing. Because I think most of it is his insecurity of not quite trusting anyone to love him enough to stay and mostly of just never believing that anything will ever work out for him ("I'm crap and useless and I always fuck everything up") or be good for him, but on the other hand, I think it's also because he really doesn't know her enough to trust her. Honestly, he says he loves her at the end of S1? And I'm like, "You haven't had enough interaction with her, babe. Knowing that you want to take a chance on her, that she's important to you? Yes, absolutely. But love? I don't know, babydoll." Still, it's realistic, because he's a sixteen-year-old kid. Of course he's going to think that that's love. But one of the few letdowns of the show for me is that we don't really get to see him interacting with Cass in a straightforward and healthy way. During most of S1, he's ignoring her, too focused on Michelle (and Tony, of course), and then in S2 there's the DRAMA OMG, and I would have just liked to have seen them being simple together like when they sat on the bench because I think that would have been really great and then maybe I would have believed that he loves her. Because I also feel like people say, “Sid loves Cassie,” way more than I actually see him loving her? Like, I don’t doubt that he could. But I just don’t feel like the evidence is there onscreen? So what I envision post-series is him finding her in NY and them getting to know each other and her getting help for her mental issues—help that really helps, not Abby’s mom’s loony bin—and then really falling in love. Because I think they could really work. But I want to see it more. Does that make sense?
His S2 episode makes my heart ache in every conceivable way. It's really great to see his relationship with his dad start to mend, but then when he dies, and Sid walks to school barefoot and is all in a daze, it just kills me ("I didn't know what to do, so I came to college"). And then he tells off Abby and says that Tony loves Michelle, and Tony believes him, no question. AND THEN SID BREAKS DOWN JUST BREAKS DOWN WHILE THAT MUSIC IS PLAYING AND TONY CATCHES HIM WHEN HE CRUMPLES AND MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOOYS. GREATEST BROMANCE. GREATEST.
Michelle's really hated in fandom, which I kind of understand because in some ways she's sort of the stereotypically hot girl who's too wrapped up in a guy. But I adore her. Because she's a smart girl, and she's so aware of her weaknesses. She knows that people think of her only for her body--there's that great moment when she tells Jal, "You play clarinet and I look shaggable," and even though it's this light moment, it just shattered my heart, because that's all she thinks she is. Like, epitome of a woman being brainwashed by culture. And she does love Tony. Totally. And she was willfully blind for a long time to the ways that he hurt her because she just loved him so much. And she doesn't hide it. She's very open with how she feels about him, and I love that about her. But at the same time, she does reach a breaking point where she can't live in denial anymore--when she sees him with Maxxie with her own eyes. And after that she's strong. She really is. She says, "This is over," and she means it, and she doesn't crumble until he actually comes out and tells her that he loves her and then of course there's the accident and things just fall apart.
And when Sid and Michelle sleep together in S2, it makes so much sense for who they are. Because she's so raw over what's been going on with Tony and the fact that her life is always being up-ended by whatever guy her mom marries, and he's just lost his dad and the thing with Cassie has gone kaput. And they're friends. Really, really good friends, and I think their relationship is so incredibly sweet. And I could almost ship them together if I didn't believe that them turning to each other was about needing comfort for how much their lives suck and also about how confused they are about their relationships with Tony and also about the whole Cassie thing. And they just understand each other so well because they've both called an end to their latest relationships because of how they realize they don't really know the person they love, and also they're tangled up in being so confused about Tony and about how they should relate to him. So them turning to each other = most natural thing in the world. When he says, "Chelle, I'm so lonely," and she says, "I know," I yell MY HEEEEEEEEEEEARRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTT!!!! Because these kids. So desperately lonely and scared.
But yeah, I don't ship it because I love Tony and Michelle together, I really do. I love them in that "they’re totally messed up" kind of way but also because I think that they could actually be good for each other if they tried--and by tried, re: S1 I mostly mean if Tony tried. They really do understand each other, I think. Tony is totally under Michelle’s skin—she couldn’t escape from him if she wanted to, and I think she knows that. I think a lot of her absolute terror at the beginning of S2 comes from her knowing that. That Tony is a part of her she'll never be able to exorcise, but after he's been hurt, he's so different, and she's scared that he's different and she's scared that he's the same, and she's scared that he won't ever come back to her, and she's scared that he will and she'll lose herself in him again, and she's scared that if he comes back he'll be just like he was and she's scared that if he comes back he won't be anything like he was, and she's just so ridiculously scared that she tries to ignore the fact that TONY IS ALWAYS THERE. And it just doesn’t quite work because he’s in her too deep. And while Effy and Sid are definitely the two people Tony loves most in the world, I think he actually loves Michelle more than he lets on, too. I think he loves her more than he’s comfortable with, and that’s why he treats her badly, because he can’t handle that. Which doesn’t excuse it, obviously. But it took her breaking off with him back in S1 for him to realize how important she is to him, and he realizes he does love her, but then he has such a ridiculous time trying to figure out whether he can actually voice that or not. And the tragedy is that finally, finally at the end of the series he realizes that he loves her, that he's become a person he never intended to be (his talk with Sid at the hospital when after they see Effy GUTS ME MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOYS!) and he wants to be someone different. And he's just taking those steps towards becoming something more but then that DAMN BUS COMES OUT OF NOWHERE AND RUINS IT ALL.
And she just doesn't know what to do. Like I said, all of that fear of all these conflicting things. And she says, "It doesn't work anymore. I'm not a good enough person," and it's such this truthful moment. Because everyone would expect her to stand by him and be all selfless and play the woman's role, and she's just so scared that she can't. And she doesn't owe that to him, of course, she doesn't owe him anything, but I don't think she sees it that way--I think she thinks that she owes him everything. And a lot of us aren't good enough people. My uncle is a quadrapalegic with partial use of his hands, and he has had medical problems ever since his accident, which happened before he married my aunt. He got married and his wife couldn't handle all of his medical problems and she left him. And then he married my aunt and she's stood by him through so many difficult things, and they are seriously the best people in the world and I admire them so much because they're so selfless and always thinking about other people even though their lives are so hard. But they're extraordinary. I don't think a lot of people would be that way. And it's so much harder when you're 16/17. Of course Michelle is terrified and of course she doesn't know what to do and who to be for Tony, and honestly, she doesn't really have to be anything for him but she feels like she does. And yeah, sometimes she's way too self-pitying. Sometimes she is. But that is so, so human and so natural and understandable and I love her so much even through that.
But they both do a lot of growing up in Series 2, and I think that if the kept on that path, they could run into each other again and sort of pick up where they left off, only this time make it work. And I realize that they are MY SHIP with their last scene in the finale:
OH MY HEAAAAARRRTTTT!! AND THEY'RE SMILING AND LAUGHING TOGETHER! HOW COULD ANYTHING BE SO PERFECT?
And yet possibly even more perfect—Tony and Sid and “I always loved you best, Sid,” and hugging and crying and FAVORITE BROMANCE. MY BOOOOOOYS!
I also lovelovelovelovelove Tony and Effy together. I would watch an entire show about them being siblings. Like, there are no words. When Michelle says, "Sometimes I think you're the only person in the world Tony really cares about," it makes me flail, because as y'all know, I am mad about awesome sibling relationships. And the fact that this sociopathic manipulative boy just flat-out loves his sister with no complications in it at all and isn't ashamed of it and would do anything for her, and this girl who's totally disconnected from everyone and everything and is basically this nihilistic hedonist loves him right back just works for me. Like, when she screams when the bus hits him. Perfect. The only thing that we see break her is Tony. He's the only one she ever shows any real emotion about, and that is awesome. I think a huge reason I haven't watched the second generation is because I don't have any real interest in seeing who she is apart from Tony. I just want the two of them. MAYBE IN THE MOVIE. MAYBE IN THE MOVIE. Although I’m kind of in love with Effy in the first two series, and my perpetual wavering between watching and not watching the next generation is swinging towards not watching right now because I hear they kind of ruin her character? And I kind of love the way she’ll sit there and tell Sid exactly what all his problems are and how he feels about them and then is like, “You do this thing for me, I’ll fix them.” Also, did I mention that I lovelovelovelovelove her interactions with Tony? Because I do. Forever.
I have to say that at first I really didn’t understand Cassie in S2. She seems so needlessly self-destructive and hateful, and I don’t really believe her reconciliation with Sid. The only thing I can come up with is that Sid breaking up with her prompted a relapse and she’s dealing with some intense mental health issues again. Which makes sense—she’d only started to recover at the end of S1. It just sort of makes my heart hurt because you watch her dancing at the beginning of S1 (yay Highland dancing, btw) and she looks happy and healthy. And then there’s the breakup and BOOM. Instant self-destruction and cynicism. So all of that spells a relapse—this time it doesn’t manifest itself, really, through the eating disorder but through something that looks a lot closer to self-destructive depression. So she’s sleeping with anyone and everyone and being really harsh to Michelle, and yeah, she takes Sid back, but I don’t for one minute believe that everything’s okay with them. The only times she seems happy and healthy are when she’s interacting with Chris. Their relationship is really sweet—they seem to be taking care of each other. And seeing him die—gah. No wonder she ran off. When viewing this as a mental breakdown, it all totally, totally makes sense to me. One thing that draws me in about Cassie is that the people who should be close to her don’t seem to see her at all or understand her, but complete strangers will go out of their way for her. We’ve got Alan, the cab driver in S1, and then when she runs away to New York, we have another taxi driver and also that Adam guy who takes her home just to be nice. Her fragility is interesting to me in that it seems to make her invisible to most people in her life but makes strangers very protective of her. And I really love the scene where the hard-ass headmistress lady says, “I’ve been where you are.” And then they dance to disco music. Excellence. I can’t say that I think her arc is wonderfully well-constructed because I’m actually not sure what the writers were trying to do with her and I’m honestly not sure whether they knew, either. But as a portrayal of the raw pain of mental illness, Hannah Murray really does a good job.
Anwar has the least depth of all the characters, really, and as lovable as Dev Patel is, he’s the one I come closest to disliking of the main cast members. I am not fond of guys who think only with their other heads. Like, seriously. SLEEPING WITH YOUR BFF’S STALKER WHO TRIED TO POISON MICHELLE? NOT A WISE MOVE. It’s so incredibly selfish (oh, and btw? I HATE HATE HATE the Sketch plotline. Not only does it have one of those horrific "false rape accusation by a bitter woman" things going on, but I just don't like her. BLECH. NO MORE OF THAT, PLEASE). On the other hand, his struggle with Maxxie’s sexuality in S1 rings true, and the one moment where I think, “He’s an actual person,” is when Sketch makes him do the five year test and he realizes he’s never thought about what he’ll do with his life. He can tell you where all of his friends will end up, but he has no idea who he’ll turn out to be. I think it was really great of the writers to write this guy as working really, really hard at school—and still absolutely failing. They would have had him squeak through on another show. But that was really truthful, and they still gave him a happy-ish ending letting him ride off into the sunset with Maxxie (who he doesn’t deserve, by the way).
Chris is like the most lovable person ever, and I am in love with Joe Dempsie’s face. Best face. I just want to grab him by the shoulders and SHAKE HIM in S1 with the whole Angie thing, though. And it’s so sad because he’s really crazy about her and wants to treat her well, but it’s just such a NO NO NO NO NO CHRIS moment. I really enjoy watching him grow up in S2—realizing that he has a secret and seeing how he decides to work hard for Jal and makes things happen, it’s all really nice. And he and Jal really work without feeling like you’re being hit over the head with “They’re opposites!” It makes sense that he’s the one to die, too, because he’s the one who is the most in love with the craziness of life. He’s, like, the archetypal character who burns so bright that he has to die young. His candle won’t last the night, you know? Breaks my heart, and the funeral scene is the most perfect thing ever.
And Jal's speech, oh my heart. Oh my heart. I think Larissa is a really fantastically underrated actress because she's something of a square without ever being bitchy. And so her romance with Chris really feels earned, because she isn't the kind who would throw away her future on just some guy--he has to be special and Chris is to her. And when she breaks down in the hospital and then again after the funeral--it does things to my soul. I had also forgotten how good of a friend Jal is and how no one else is as good of a friend to her. She's the only one who's constantly aware of everyone else's feelings (I especially love how she takes care of both Michelle and Cassie. The finale makes me wish there had been lots, lots more Michelle and Jal being BFF scenes, because I love my girls. I needed more of that. Lots more). She's the most responsible person on the show, adults included, the most easily compassionate and she's totally no-nonsense. Perfect girl, I love her, I wish we'd gotten to see so much more of her. It's also really interesting that she's the most privileged character on the show, because her dad is a big deal in the music industry and clearly has money. Of course, her family situation is messed up because everyone on this show's is. Except Maxxie and Anwar. Anwar's parents clearly love him even if he's impatient with them a lot--but how much do I LOOOOVE his dad? Maxxie's got a great home life. Only characters with two actually good parents. He clashes with his dad over his future, but his dad still loves him and is good to him. Maxxie's the only other one who is a good friend--to Anwar and then to Tony when he needs somebody. Maxxie's basically the sweetest boy in the world. Made of sunshine. They never really developed him enough, though, and sometimes he's way too mired in the cliche of a gay teen boy. There was lots more they could have done with him, but whenever they do do something with him, he's interesting.
I really think that in some ways this show is about trying to figure out how to be an adult without having anyone to show you how. There are a lot of absent mothers (Sid, Jal, Chris) and dads (Chris, Michelle) and really harsh dads (Sid and Tony and to a lesser extent Jal). Tony's got a great mom, it seems, until his accident when she becomes addicted to prescription drugs, and Michelle's loves her, but there's such a distance between them--they don't have any real idea what their kids are up to. And then there's Cassie, who has parents who are nice enough and love each other but who don't see her at all. She's like a ghost walking through her own house. And their teachers are all ineffectual or sleeping with them (except for Jal's band conductor, who really does help her). So they're these kids who are on their own in a lot of ways. And trying desperately how to grow up and figure out who they are, but they have no role models. It's fascinating and heartbreaking.
Like, in a way, to me, the entire show is summed up in Sid's episode in S2 when his dad dies. And Sid sits there beside his dead body and says, "Dad? What do I do?" But there isn't any answer. There's no one to answer.
ANYWAYS. I know that that was nowhere nearly coherent or well-laid out: basically fangirl word-vomit. You should not be surprised--I'm never going to be one to write well-constructed meta. My brain doesn't work in anything like a linear way, and y'all are dolls to put up with me when I get this way. *kisses*
I had seriously forgotten how much Sid makes my heart hurt and how badly I want to wrap him in blankets and give him hot chocolate and tell him that everything's going to be all right. THAT POOR BOY. Seriously, nothing ever goes right for him. Life is just so hard for him and it just breaks my heart into little tiny pieces and I don't know what to do with myself. I just don't know.
But seriously, he and Michelle became my POV characters this watch-through. The first time I watched the show, I wasn't living it with the characters, I was just watching and enjoying everybody, and probably Cassie and Tony were the most dramatic characters so they were the ones I thought most about. But this time it was all about watching through Sid and Michelle. And Sid's exactly my kind of character--he screws up everything and is bad at everything and he's just a mess, and he's always outshined by Tony, who's ridiculously smart and good-looking and knows how to get what he wants. And Sid really does spend a lot of time wanting to be Tony, and honestly I think a lot of his feelings for Michelle come from that. So when he has that "I can't think of anything worse than being you!" moment in "Effy," it's this HUGE MOMENT for him, because he figures out what it is that he wants--he wants Cassie--and what he doesn't want--to be Tony. And even though I think the show could have done a better job of actually developing the Sid/Cassie relationship, I do ship it because she's the first thing, I think, he really wants for just himself that has nothing to do with anyone else.
And he assumes the worst about her when she goes away, and really, considering what he sees--her on a bed in lingerie with a naked guy--it's not an unreasonable assumption. But I'm trying to unpack the whole, "No, I don't trust you," thing. Because I think most of it is his insecurity of not quite trusting anyone to love him enough to stay and mostly of just never believing that anything will ever work out for him ("I'm crap and useless and I always fuck everything up") or be good for him, but on the other hand, I think it's also because he really doesn't know her enough to trust her. Honestly, he says he loves her at the end of S1? And I'm like, "You haven't had enough interaction with her, babe. Knowing that you want to take a chance on her, that she's important to you? Yes, absolutely. But love? I don't know, babydoll." Still, it's realistic, because he's a sixteen-year-old kid. Of course he's going to think that that's love. But one of the few letdowns of the show for me is that we don't really get to see him interacting with Cass in a straightforward and healthy way. During most of S1, he's ignoring her, too focused on Michelle (and Tony, of course), and then in S2 there's the DRAMA OMG, and I would have just liked to have seen them being simple together like when they sat on the bench because I think that would have been really great and then maybe I would have believed that he loves her. Because I also feel like people say, “Sid loves Cassie,” way more than I actually see him loving her? Like, I don’t doubt that he could. But I just don’t feel like the evidence is there onscreen? So what I envision post-series is him finding her in NY and them getting to know each other and her getting help for her mental issues—help that really helps, not Abby’s mom’s loony bin—and then really falling in love. Because I think they could really work. But I want to see it more. Does that make sense?
His S2 episode makes my heart ache in every conceivable way. It's really great to see his relationship with his dad start to mend, but then when he dies, and Sid walks to school barefoot and is all in a daze, it just kills me ("I didn't know what to do, so I came to college"). And then he tells off Abby and says that Tony loves Michelle, and Tony believes him, no question. AND THEN SID BREAKS DOWN JUST BREAKS DOWN WHILE THAT MUSIC IS PLAYING AND TONY CATCHES HIM WHEN HE CRUMPLES AND MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOOYS. GREATEST BROMANCE. GREATEST.
Michelle's really hated in fandom, which I kind of understand because in some ways she's sort of the stereotypically hot girl who's too wrapped up in a guy. But I adore her. Because she's a smart girl, and she's so aware of her weaknesses. She knows that people think of her only for her body--there's that great moment when she tells Jal, "You play clarinet and I look shaggable," and even though it's this light moment, it just shattered my heart, because that's all she thinks she is. Like, epitome of a woman being brainwashed by culture. And she does love Tony. Totally. And she was willfully blind for a long time to the ways that he hurt her because she just loved him so much. And she doesn't hide it. She's very open with how she feels about him, and I love that about her. But at the same time, she does reach a breaking point where she can't live in denial anymore--when she sees him with Maxxie with her own eyes. And after that she's strong. She really is. She says, "This is over," and she means it, and she doesn't crumble until he actually comes out and tells her that he loves her and then of course there's the accident and things just fall apart.
And when Sid and Michelle sleep together in S2, it makes so much sense for who they are. Because she's so raw over what's been going on with Tony and the fact that her life is always being up-ended by whatever guy her mom marries, and he's just lost his dad and the thing with Cassie has gone kaput. And they're friends. Really, really good friends, and I think their relationship is so incredibly sweet. And I could almost ship them together if I didn't believe that them turning to each other was about needing comfort for how much their lives suck and also about how confused they are about their relationships with Tony and also about the whole Cassie thing. And they just understand each other so well because they've both called an end to their latest relationships because of how they realize they don't really know the person they love, and also they're tangled up in being so confused about Tony and about how they should relate to him. So them turning to each other = most natural thing in the world. When he says, "Chelle, I'm so lonely," and she says, "I know," I yell MY HEEEEEEEEEEEARRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTT!!!! Because these kids. So desperately lonely and scared.
But yeah, I don't ship it because I love Tony and Michelle together, I really do. I love them in that "they’re totally messed up" kind of way but also because I think that they could actually be good for each other if they tried--and by tried, re: S1 I mostly mean if Tony tried. They really do understand each other, I think. Tony is totally under Michelle’s skin—she couldn’t escape from him if she wanted to, and I think she knows that. I think a lot of her absolute terror at the beginning of S2 comes from her knowing that. That Tony is a part of her she'll never be able to exorcise, but after he's been hurt, he's so different, and she's scared that he's different and she's scared that he's the same, and she's scared that he won't ever come back to her, and she's scared that he will and she'll lose herself in him again, and she's scared that if he comes back he'll be just like he was and she's scared that if he comes back he won't be anything like he was, and she's just so ridiculously scared that she tries to ignore the fact that TONY IS ALWAYS THERE. And it just doesn’t quite work because he’s in her too deep. And while Effy and Sid are definitely the two people Tony loves most in the world, I think he actually loves Michelle more than he lets on, too. I think he loves her more than he’s comfortable with, and that’s why he treats her badly, because he can’t handle that. Which doesn’t excuse it, obviously. But it took her breaking off with him back in S1 for him to realize how important she is to him, and he realizes he does love her, but then he has such a ridiculous time trying to figure out whether he can actually voice that or not. And the tragedy is that finally, finally at the end of the series he realizes that he loves her, that he's become a person he never intended to be (his talk with Sid at the hospital when after they see Effy GUTS ME MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOYS!) and he wants to be someone different. And he's just taking those steps towards becoming something more but then that DAMN BUS COMES OUT OF NOWHERE AND RUINS IT ALL.
And she just doesn't know what to do. Like I said, all of that fear of all these conflicting things. And she says, "It doesn't work anymore. I'm not a good enough person," and it's such this truthful moment. Because everyone would expect her to stand by him and be all selfless and play the woman's role, and she's just so scared that she can't. And she doesn't owe that to him, of course, she doesn't owe him anything, but I don't think she sees it that way--I think she thinks that she owes him everything. And a lot of us aren't good enough people. My uncle is a quadrapalegic with partial use of his hands, and he has had medical problems ever since his accident, which happened before he married my aunt. He got married and his wife couldn't handle all of his medical problems and she left him. And then he married my aunt and she's stood by him through so many difficult things, and they are seriously the best people in the world and I admire them so much because they're so selfless and always thinking about other people even though their lives are so hard. But they're extraordinary. I don't think a lot of people would be that way. And it's so much harder when you're 16/17. Of course Michelle is terrified and of course she doesn't know what to do and who to be for Tony, and honestly, she doesn't really have to be anything for him but she feels like she does. And yeah, sometimes she's way too self-pitying. Sometimes she is. But that is so, so human and so natural and understandable and I love her so much even through that.
But they both do a lot of growing up in Series 2, and I think that if the kept on that path, they could run into each other again and sort of pick up where they left off, only this time make it work. And I realize that they are MY SHIP with their last scene in the finale:
"We were good, weren’t we?"
"We were better than that."
OH MY HEAAAAARRRTTTT!! AND THEY'RE SMILING AND LAUGHING TOGETHER! HOW COULD ANYTHING BE SO PERFECT?
And yet possibly even more perfect—Tony and Sid and “I always loved you best, Sid,” and hugging and crying and FAVORITE BROMANCE. MY BOOOOOOYS!
I also lovelovelovelovelove Tony and Effy together. I would watch an entire show about them being siblings. Like, there are no words. When Michelle says, "Sometimes I think you're the only person in the world Tony really cares about," it makes me flail, because as y'all know, I am mad about awesome sibling relationships. And the fact that this sociopathic manipulative boy just flat-out loves his sister with no complications in it at all and isn't ashamed of it and would do anything for her, and this girl who's totally disconnected from everyone and everything and is basically this nihilistic hedonist loves him right back just works for me. Like, when she screams when the bus hits him. Perfect. The only thing that we see break her is Tony. He's the only one she ever shows any real emotion about, and that is awesome. I think a huge reason I haven't watched the second generation is because I don't have any real interest in seeing who she is apart from Tony. I just want the two of them. MAYBE IN THE MOVIE. MAYBE IN THE MOVIE. Although I’m kind of in love with Effy in the first two series, and my perpetual wavering between watching and not watching the next generation is swinging towards not watching right now because I hear they kind of ruin her character? And I kind of love the way she’ll sit there and tell Sid exactly what all his problems are and how he feels about them and then is like, “You do this thing for me, I’ll fix them.” Also, did I mention that I lovelovelovelovelove her interactions with Tony? Because I do. Forever.
I have to say that at first I really didn’t understand Cassie in S2. She seems so needlessly self-destructive and hateful, and I don’t really believe her reconciliation with Sid. The only thing I can come up with is that Sid breaking up with her prompted a relapse and she’s dealing with some intense mental health issues again. Which makes sense—she’d only started to recover at the end of S1. It just sort of makes my heart hurt because you watch her dancing at the beginning of S1 (yay Highland dancing, btw) and she looks happy and healthy. And then there’s the breakup and BOOM. Instant self-destruction and cynicism. So all of that spells a relapse—this time it doesn’t manifest itself, really, through the eating disorder but through something that looks a lot closer to self-destructive depression. So she’s sleeping with anyone and everyone and being really harsh to Michelle, and yeah, she takes Sid back, but I don’t for one minute believe that everything’s okay with them. The only times she seems happy and healthy are when she’s interacting with Chris. Their relationship is really sweet—they seem to be taking care of each other. And seeing him die—gah. No wonder she ran off. When viewing this as a mental breakdown, it all totally, totally makes sense to me. One thing that draws me in about Cassie is that the people who should be close to her don’t seem to see her at all or understand her, but complete strangers will go out of their way for her. We’ve got Alan, the cab driver in S1, and then when she runs away to New York, we have another taxi driver and also that Adam guy who takes her home just to be nice. Her fragility is interesting to me in that it seems to make her invisible to most people in her life but makes strangers very protective of her. And I really love the scene where the hard-ass headmistress lady says, “I’ve been where you are.” And then they dance to disco music. Excellence. I can’t say that I think her arc is wonderfully well-constructed because I’m actually not sure what the writers were trying to do with her and I’m honestly not sure whether they knew, either. But as a portrayal of the raw pain of mental illness, Hannah Murray really does a good job.
Anwar has the least depth of all the characters, really, and as lovable as Dev Patel is, he’s the one I come closest to disliking of the main cast members. I am not fond of guys who think only with their other heads. Like, seriously. SLEEPING WITH YOUR BFF’S STALKER WHO TRIED TO POISON MICHELLE? NOT A WISE MOVE. It’s so incredibly selfish (oh, and btw? I HATE HATE HATE the Sketch plotline. Not only does it have one of those horrific "false rape accusation by a bitter woman" things going on, but I just don't like her. BLECH. NO MORE OF THAT, PLEASE). On the other hand, his struggle with Maxxie’s sexuality in S1 rings true, and the one moment where I think, “He’s an actual person,” is when Sketch makes him do the five year test and he realizes he’s never thought about what he’ll do with his life. He can tell you where all of his friends will end up, but he has no idea who he’ll turn out to be. I think it was really great of the writers to write this guy as working really, really hard at school—and still absolutely failing. They would have had him squeak through on another show. But that was really truthful, and they still gave him a happy-ish ending letting him ride off into the sunset with Maxxie (who he doesn’t deserve, by the way).
Chris is like the most lovable person ever, and I am in love with Joe Dempsie’s face. Best face. I just want to grab him by the shoulders and SHAKE HIM in S1 with the whole Angie thing, though. And it’s so sad because he’s really crazy about her and wants to treat her well, but it’s just such a NO NO NO NO NO CHRIS moment. I really enjoy watching him grow up in S2—realizing that he has a secret and seeing how he decides to work hard for Jal and makes things happen, it’s all really nice. And he and Jal really work without feeling like you’re being hit over the head with “They’re opposites!” It makes sense that he’s the one to die, too, because he’s the one who is the most in love with the craziness of life. He’s, like, the archetypal character who burns so bright that he has to die young. His candle won’t last the night, you know? Breaks my heart, and the funeral scene is the most perfect thing ever.
And Jal's speech, oh my heart. Oh my heart. I think Larissa is a really fantastically underrated actress because she's something of a square without ever being bitchy. And so her romance with Chris really feels earned, because she isn't the kind who would throw away her future on just some guy--he has to be special and Chris is to her. And when she breaks down in the hospital and then again after the funeral--it does things to my soul. I had also forgotten how good of a friend Jal is and how no one else is as good of a friend to her. She's the only one who's constantly aware of everyone else's feelings (I especially love how she takes care of both Michelle and Cassie. The finale makes me wish there had been lots, lots more Michelle and Jal being BFF scenes, because I love my girls. I needed more of that. Lots more). She's the most responsible person on the show, adults included, the most easily compassionate and she's totally no-nonsense. Perfect girl, I love her, I wish we'd gotten to see so much more of her. It's also really interesting that she's the most privileged character on the show, because her dad is a big deal in the music industry and clearly has money. Of course, her family situation is messed up because everyone on this show's is. Except Maxxie and Anwar. Anwar's parents clearly love him even if he's impatient with them a lot--but how much do I LOOOOVE his dad? Maxxie's got a great home life. Only characters with two actually good parents. He clashes with his dad over his future, but his dad still loves him and is good to him. Maxxie's the only other one who is a good friend--to Anwar and then to Tony when he needs somebody. Maxxie's basically the sweetest boy in the world. Made of sunshine. They never really developed him enough, though, and sometimes he's way too mired in the cliche of a gay teen boy. There was lots more they could have done with him, but whenever they do do something with him, he's interesting.
I really think that in some ways this show is about trying to figure out how to be an adult without having anyone to show you how. There are a lot of absent mothers (Sid, Jal, Chris) and dads (Chris, Michelle) and really harsh dads (Sid and Tony and to a lesser extent Jal). Tony's got a great mom, it seems, until his accident when she becomes addicted to prescription drugs, and Michelle's loves her, but there's such a distance between them--they don't have any real idea what their kids are up to. And then there's Cassie, who has parents who are nice enough and love each other but who don't see her at all. She's like a ghost walking through her own house. And their teachers are all ineffectual or sleeping with them (except for Jal's band conductor, who really does help her). So they're these kids who are on their own in a lot of ways. And trying desperately how to grow up and figure out who they are, but they have no role models. It's fascinating and heartbreaking.
Like, in a way, to me, the entire show is summed up in Sid's episode in S2 when his dad dies. And Sid sits there beside his dead body and says, "Dad? What do I do?" But there isn't any answer. There's no one to answer.
ANYWAYS. I know that that was nowhere nearly coherent or well-laid out: basically fangirl word-vomit. You should not be surprised--I'm never going to be one to write well-constructed meta. My brain doesn't work in anything like a linear way, and y'all are dolls to put up with me when I get this way. *kisses*
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As for Gen 2, they do kind of ruin Effy a bit. She was so distant in the Gen 1 and then in Gen 2, she's sort of the protagonist and she is just way too involved in everything. And "everything" includes a lot of really stupid plotlines. And Tony's absence through a lot of the crap she's going through in those seasons doesn't ring true at all for me.
Please write Sid and Cassie in New York fic! I totally agree about wanting to see them just get to know each other.
As for Michelle not being able to stay with Tony in S2, I feel like she owed him nothing. He treated her like absolute shit and seemed to take pleasure from it. I didn't really like the "We were good, weren't we?" bit because it seemed like the writers were trying to gloss over how absolutely terrible he was to her.
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So when he has that "I can't think of anything worse than being you!" moment in "Effy," it's this HUGE MOMENT for him
and at the end of the episode he still rescues Tony because that’s Sid. Because they ‘ll always ‘own’ each other. <3
When he says he loved Cassie, I believed him; does that make sense? That is I believed that he believed he loved her even though I don’t think it was love at that point.
I really really love those scenes where we can see that he’s starting to want her. Like when he’s playing around with their pictures on his computer. Or when he sees Maxxie’s sketch and he says “you made her beautiful,” and Maxxie says “She is beautiful”, and it’s like gears are turning in Sid’s brain…
AND THEN SID BREAKS DOWN JUST BREAKS DOWN WHILE THAT MUSIC IS PLAYING AND TONY CATCHES HIM WHEN HE CRUMPLES AND MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOOYS
YES. FAVORITE (ALL the scenes you are describing are in my OMGYESFAVORITE mind-folder :D) . I love how we don’t get to hear what Sid says, it is all in his FACE and how tightly he’s holding on to Tony. I just…this show tellsus without ever saying it out loud and that’s awesome
And when Sid and Michelle sleep together in S2, it makes so much sense for who they are.
I usually hate this sort plotline in shows, the whole “oh noes, they are sleeping together for the drama!!111” thing, but here it actually made sense.They were themselves, things were screwed up, it was going to happen. I still loved them hard through that whole mess which never happens when I’m watching other things. Guh.
Ooooh. I never thought about Cassie’s interactions with strangers before. That’s brilliant. I really feel like the writers kept Cassie cracked and she was never quite given the chance to fix herself like the other characters did. “Lay waste to the world and everyone in it” Harsh. And…almost everyone has an arc while she has big wavy lines. I don’t know, it feels like that.
Chris and Cassie! 'Hey Sid, I will bite your head off and spit in the hole if you hurt her.' Beautiful. XD
I feel like if they’d given Anwar an episode, even another shared episode, I would’ve gotten it? In the same lightbulb way that I thought I get this character now! after Michelle’s and Sid’s and Chris’s first episodes. I’m disappointed that we didn’t get to see his dad again after that amazing speech he gave Maxxie (and Anwar, really). I wanted to SEE Anwar work out his issues with Maxxie’s sexuality instead of that whole mess with Sketch (I also don’t like her. Zero sympathy) WHY ANWAR, WHY. I feel bad for you but yeesh!
And he and Jal really work without feeling like you’re being hit over the head with “They’re opposites!”
Like I once said, fastest case of OTP-worthy EVER!
He’s, like, the archetypal character who burns so bright that he has to die young. His candle won’t last the night, you know?
He IS that line in the finale song: This is our decision, live fast and die young/We got the vision, now let’s have some fun!. That’s him. Chriiiiis.
She's the most responsible person on the show, adults included, the most easily compassionate and she's totally no-nonsense.
I LOVE how no-nonsense she is. And how she just goes and goes and takes zero crap from the world. I would say you go, girl but she is telling it to herself all the time.
The coin! The speech! *sobs*
Maxxie's basically the sweetest boy in the world. Made of sunshine.
Oh, yes. That part in 2.04 where Michelle is lonely and angry and telling herself to get it together and then Maxxie walks up to her and he’s smiling and it’s like here comes the sun doodoodoodoo. I love that he’s the one who watched out for Tony after the accident. And the ending where Tony jokes about ‘gaying him up’, idk if I’m reading into it too much, but it’s like Tony’s saying I somehow know I messed us up back then but you still watched out for me. Thank you.
*cough* Um, wow, I'm almost over the character limit. MORE TONY AND MICHELLE THOUGHTS TO COME.
Also memming this because I fangirl your fangirl world-vomit like you wouldn’t believe. :D:D
my feelings let me show you them: part one.
Because I think most of it is his insecurity of not quite trusting anyone to love him enough to stay and mostly of just never believing that anything will ever work out for him ("I'm crap and useless and I always fuck everything up") or be good for him, but on the other hand, I think it's also because he really doesn't know her enough to trust her.
Totally agree. I really believe that he is 100% sincere there. But it is way too soon.
Because I also feel like people say, “Sid loves Cassie,” way more than I actually see him loving her? Like, I don’t doubt that he could. But I just don’t feel like the evidence is there onscreen? So what I envision post-series is him finding her in NY and them getting to know each other and her getting help for her mental issues—help that really helps, not Abby’s mom’s loony bin—and then really falling in love.
YES THIS TOTALLY MAKES SENSE AND IS WHAT I WANT FOR THEM TOO. lol, did I actually just say that I want 2 fictional characters to get together and fall in love and learn how to have a functional relationship? IDEK.
AND THEN SID BREAKS DOWN JUST BREAKS DOWN WHILE THAT MUSIC IS PLAYING AND TONY CATCHES HIM WHEN HE CRUMPLES AND MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOOYS.
OH MAN. OH MAN. IT JUST WRECKS ME. WRECKS ME. I cannot even watch some of these episodes in company.
When he says, "Chelle, I'm so lonely," and she says, "I know," I yell MY HEEEEEEEEEEEARRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTT!!!!
AND THIS TOO. The way he just SAYS that, and I am SOBBING. This show. I feel like it really, really hits home, it gets loneliness. Which every good work of fiction should get. Because it is a state of being. What am I saying. Feelings.
I think he actually loves Michelle more than he lets on, too. I think he loves her more than he’s comfortable with, and that’s why he treats her badly, because he can’t handle that.
Yes. But more than that, I think he really honestly relies on Michelle to not give up on him. Michelle shouldn't trust Tony for many good reasons, but Tony trusts Michelle. He trusts her to put up with his shit. And then part of his arc is learning that he actually has to work to earn that. I love these kids. They are the best developed romantic relationship on the show, in my view.
And I realize that they are MY SHIP with their last scene in the finale:
"We were good, weren’t we?"
"We were better than that."
OMG LAUREN. OTP-GASM. AFLVKA;FKDJAF.
part two
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And the tragedy is that finally, finally at the end of the series he realizes that he loves her, that he's become a person he never intended to be (his talk with Sid at the hospital when after they see Effy GUTS ME MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOYS!) and he wants to be someone different. And he's just taking those steps towards becoming something more but then that DAMN BUS COMES OUT OF NOWHERE AND RUINS IT ALL.
I just lovelovelove Tony’s arc. Love. I love that even before the accident, he wanted to change his magnificent bastard ways. And in S2, he fights to remember everything; everything, including the person that he wanted to be before the accident... And when he talks to Chris and he goes “I’m going to get it all back…what else is there?” And he does and it is glorious; he battles for himself, and yeah, he gets the old Tony-smirk back, but he’s also more of the better person he wanted to change into. <3
“You don’t fool me, Effy Stonem.” I am clinging to that quote of Tony’s no matter what havoc the writers wrought on Effy in S4. /stubborn
*flails at your Michelle thoughts* YES.EVERYTHING. Love that girl. Lovelovelove.
*flails more at Tony/Michelle* In S2,I love how he eventually starts to fight for her the way he fights for his old self. When he tells Sid that Sid "can't have her", it makes sense. I didn’t see it as a my girl my girl mine mine mine thing; it’s Tony saying she’s a part of me that only I know.
I think that if the kept on that path, they could run into each other again and sort of pick up where they left off, only this time make it work. Absolutely. I still think they are the couple that got the best ending in Skins (gen 2 included). Because Tony and Michelle have grown up enough so they can both make their way in the world and see what they want and work hard at getting it. If they decide they want each other then hells yeah, they’ll make it work . Laughing all the way to the
bankbed. Lol, oh these crazy kids. My OT-waitwhathowdidthathappen- P!