I wouldn't kill you! And I don't think you're wrong--I do think that Echo's being self-pitying there.

But I think Buffy's would be genuinely mourning this guy she loved with maybe some self-pity there. But I can't blame Buffy for that: if anyone deserves a little self-pity, it's her. And since I have a tendency to feel sorry for myself, I think it's a very human reaction, especially when she has been abandoned, time and again.