I am going to go ahead and apologize in advance about this, y'all. This is one part pimp-post of DOOM, two-parts me spewing incoherent feelings on everything in the world, with a dash of meta and some drooling thrown in. It's basically a big giant mess, just like I am these days. I am so, so sorry. Please just love me anyway.



This is a post about these kids:


source

Awww! Aren't they cute? Well, forget all about that.


Introduction
(or: they're sexy and they know it)

Note: I am blaming this opening on aerintine because she enables me. Ahem.

LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE FEMALE GAZE.



Gah, this is so over-the-top in its invitation to look at the beautiful boys and drool over how sexy they are. Like, it's so over-the-top that I'm almost ashamed for falling for it. Except that I am not even a little bit ashamed because THESE BOYS ARE REALLY HOT and they are playing to my gaze and there is no room for shame here in being a woman and having a sex drive and thinking guys are hot. I love it.




Part I: Music and Me
(or: this part will only be relevant to my friends who were wondering what happened to my sanity)

source

Y'all, in the last couple of weeks of falling for this silly little kpop band, I have sometimes wondered whether it actually makes sense to be this obsessed with a band whose music I care nothing about. ( some thoughts on music in general and my tastes in particular )

Part II: The Greatest Video Ever
(or: a brief introduction to the boys being supremely silly that proves why you should find them endearing)

I've thought that Myungsoo is beautiful since the first episode of SUFBB. And I was really taken with him when I watched clips of him on youtube because, as I said in another post, I have this huge soft spot for people who are trying to be cool and just aren't. But I didn't really expect to be taken with the rest of the boys, but I have been.

So let me share with you this video again, and I will talk about it and how much I love these kids.




Things I love about this video:

( this is who i am now apparently )

The only thing I do not like about this video: Sungyeol isn't in it, because he was sick that night. I can only imagine how much better it would be if he were. Watch this video of ridiculousness and let your imagination run wild.



Part III: The Boys
(or: way too many words and feelings about these people I have never met)

And now for some thoughts on each of the boys. I'm going in reverse-age-order because everyone always goes in age order and I want to shake things up a bit.


( diva sungjongie )

( faily faily derpsoo )

( prince sungyeol )

( dance machine hoya )

( namstar woohyun )

( flawless human being dongwoo (who might actually be the love of my life) )

( leader general grandpa gyu )

Interlude: Friendships
(or: some feelings about the two of the biggest ships in English-speaking fandom)

I want to take a brief moment to touch on a couple of relationships between the boys that I find interesting, too.

( myungsoo and sungyeol )

( woohyun and sunggyu )

Part IV: INFINITE
(or: who they are as a group)

source

And I think another aspect of my affection for them is that they are, in a lot of ways, the underdogs. ( who they are )

Conclusion
(or: actually, I don't just treat them like eye candy)

Now, remember how cute they are:


source

Awwww!

But here's the thing: for all that drooling I did way up there at the top of this post, 90% of the time I don't really look at these kids that way? I feel like I've gotten to know them a bit through their variety show appearances, and I'm very, very fond of the ones I'm fond of. But most of the time it's in a big sisterly way. Like, I want to be their noona and look after them and take care of them and give them advice and tease them and stuff. Like I said: not hugely into their music, but I'm proud of them for working so very, very hard (it's amazing to me how hard Korean entertainers work. Their work ethic is insane). But then that 10% of the happens: they'll come out with a video that's all about how hot they are and I'm like, "OH YEAH THEY'RE ATTRACTIVE, TOO."

Anyway, these boys make me happy. I'm pleased that they were my introduction to kpop and that they are, from what I can tell, having a hell of a lot of fun making music and dancing together. I hope they keep it up for as long as it makes them happy.

And now if you're curious, here are their music videos (I actually included the dance versions of a couple of them because they're better than the actual videos):

( music videos galore! )

Title: they’re telling our story on the radio
Fandom: Buffyverse/kpop RPF (of sorts)
Written for: seasonal_spuffy
Rating: PG
Word count: 10,520(!!!)
Warning: Crack, silliness, and (fond) mocking of real people
Characters/pairings: Buffy/Spike, OC Slayers, OC witch, members of the Korean band Infinite
Setting: post-“Not Fade Away,” can possibly be set in my “Variations on Eternity”-verse if you like
Explanation: Um. So. My head’s been totally in kdrama land lately, but it’s my seasonal_spuffy day. So I decided to combine the two things. Because that is who I am now apparently. There are a couple of not-so-veiled references to various kdramas floating around in here as well as appearances by actual people, but no real knowledge of Korean pop culture are necessary to understanding the story. I’ll be honest with y’all: this is really just an excuse to cast Yoon Eun Hye as a Slayer and to make fun of Kim Myung Soo. I have no excuse for my ridiculousness. Just love me anyway.
A/N: The only thing you need to know to understand this story is that fangirls for the band Infinite call themselves “Inspirits.” There are links to songs and videos that might help you enjoy the fic more, but they're absolutely not necessary to understanding it (and I make no promises as to the quality of the music). Korean culture is not my own, so I apologize for any mistakes I may have made. The title comes from the song “Cuckoo” by Lissie. Thanks to angearia for absolutely invaluable feedback and to snickfic for saving me from ruining Spike’s voice completely. This hasn’t been fully betaed, though, so any and all mistakes and rough patches are my own.
Summary: “We have to save them. They have a comeback scheduled next week. And if it’s too hot where the demon is keeping them, Myung Soo might go crazy.” Wherein Buffy and Spike have to team up with Korean Slayers to save a kpop boy band from a demon. And there is crack and dancing demons and a discussion about how great Black Books is and torture-by-pop-music and unrequited love and harnessing the power of fangirls to take over the world. Of course.

Read it below or at seasonal_spuffy

( there's no turning back if you follow the cut )

Y'all, I can't even tell you what my seasonal_spuffy fic is about (on the off-chance that I don't finish it in time, I don't want people to be disappointed), but I think it signals that I am indeed losing the last vestiges of my sanity. I don't even know who I am anymore. It is that ridiculous. Crack-ville, here I come.

I don’t really have much to say? But I feel the need to check in and make posts so:

+ Kdramas have taken over my brain. I remember once Emmie asked me what I liked about them, and I don't think I answered because at the time I didn't know, but now I know: they cater to my id far more than American TV does. I think that's because they're less post-modern-ly ironic? They're not afraid to be earnest, plus a lot of my kinks seem to be their kinks. I don't know that they've yet produced something that captures life the way, say, Friday Night Lights or (I hear tell) The Wire or something, but it's a younger medium over there and they have given me things like Mawang, and I will die on this hill: THAT DRAMA WAS ART. HIGH ART. The end.

+ I’ve watched the first three episodes of My Girlfriend is a Gumiho, which I love mostly because of Shin Min Ah’s absolutely unbelievably adorable performance as said gumiho. It is, however, a Hong sisters show, and I have the same complaints about it that I do about their other stuff (too slapstick and OTT at times, too much bathroom humor, etc.). But I’m definitely enjoying it. Mi Ho reminds me so much of Anya with her blunt literalism coming from not knowing modern culture, and while Dae Woong hasn't totally won me over yet (he's too selfish at this point), I can already tell he's going to grow into someone awesome. They will SO be one of my ships, I can already tell.

+ On the other hand…it might be a while till I finish it, because I have decided that this weekend I’m going to rewatch Shut Up! Flower Boy Band. I cannot get over how much I love it. I can’t get over how much I care about these kids and their lost little selves. I can’t get over how great (and nuanced) the bromances are and how functional (and adorable) the ships are. I can’t get over the pacing and HOW IT DOESN’T LAG and is exactly as long as it should be. I can’t get over how much it cares about its characters and the lives it lets them live. I’m going to be buying this on DVD, joining Goong and (probably) Mawang on my list of kdramas-I-must-own. GAH.

+ As brilliant as this drama is, I can’t find any good icons for it. So if any of you are ever bored and want to fool around with some caps, I’ve put some (read: a ridiculous amount) behind the cut. I don’t know how good they’ll be for iconning, since that’s not what I do, but they’re there if you ever want to make my day for some reason.

( cut for caps )

+ [Sidebar: sometimes it sucks being so picky about icons. I mean, I could easily just crop any of these caps and BOOM there would be an icon. They're quality enough for that. But just a cap doesn't do it for me. I want them to be pretty and artistic and way more crafted than I am capable of doing. Ugh. I should really, really teach myself how to icon so that I'm not at the whims of other people.]

+ I’m also working on a picspam of my fave Korean actors. I think I just miss tumblr and all those pretty, pretty graphics.

+ I am behind on American TV. I haven’t watched this last week’s TVD or GOT or anything at all. That’s how much in kdrama land I am.

+ Also how in kdrama I am: my typical romance-will-happen-to-me-if-it-does-and-if-it-doesn’t-I’ve-got-the-internet-and-stories attitude has flown out the window and I’m all I WANT TO BE IN LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE. Hopefully this will pass soon. I’m reminding myself of the terrible breakups Lil Sis and the BFF have just gone through.

+ The BFF and I have plans to see Hunger Games at some point this week, so look for my thoughts on that.

+ Still plugging away at the novel. I’ll have 50,000 words by the end of the week. I’m very proud of myself!

+ Still haven't written any fic. I have like 500 words of my mpreg fic, but that is all I have accomplished in forever. I SUCK AT LIFE.

+ Blahblahblah. But if anything's going on with you, feel free to tell me about it! I'd love to hear!

Y'all, help me decide if I can actually commit to seasonal_spuffy this round. Because last round I ended up posting nothing for the first time ever, and I am worried I will do that again this round.

Keep in mind that:

+ I haven't started my rarewomen entry

+ I haven't started my Het Mpreg entry, either (when is that due again?)

+ I haven't written anything fic-wise since January, and that was just comment fic for the Bechdel Ficathon. Before that the last thing (of length) I wrote was for Yuletide.

+ My mind is pretty much in my novel-place.

Uuuuugh, I don't know. Like, I love SS. I think it's helping so much to keep our fandom alive and such. And I want to participate! But I just don't know!

That said, leave some things you'd like to see in Buffy/Spike fic in the comments. Maybe something will take over my brain?

i fail at life so hard.

i just went over here:


(click on the picture)

and left a bunch of prompts, and every single one of them was a faulkner quote. whyyyyyy?

Just popping my head in to say that I have been sick, which is why I'm failing so hard at the Lady Celebration thing. Needless to say that I missed a few days and may miss a few more. We're not quite sure what I've got going on, but my doctor thinks right now that it might be a gallbladder infection, so I had some tests and such today. Hopefully I'll know by tomorrow. I'm on some antibiotics, so I'm hoping against hope that they'll take care of the issue because worst case scenario is that I'll have to have it removed and I am PETRIFIED at the idea of surgery, which I have never had before and there would also be the missing of more days of work and my parents would have to skip their anniversary trip and stay in town to take care of me since my sister's in Costa Rica, which would suck (and actually, my doctor didn't even mention the possibility of surgery at all and probably for good reason, because THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR GOOGLING MY TENTATIVE DIAGNOSIS. I wish I could stop doing that. I always jump to the worst conclusions).

Anyway! I'm feeling a bit better today and if I feel even better tomorrow, I'll go back to work, which will be a good thing. Just wanted to keep y'all updated.

In super exciting news, my BFF who's watching BtVS for the first time is TOTALLY A SPUFFY SHIPPER OMG SHE HAS THE RIGHT OPINIONS ON EVERYTHING.

Oh, haaaaaaiiiiii. It’s one of those posts where I talk about how much I fail at eljay. Which is a lot. So let’s skip that part and get right to me asking how y’all are. Everything okay? Anything awesome/important that I’ve missed? What is going on with you?

Here’s what is going on with me.

Top TenFifteen Things That Are Awesome at the Moment
1. Ramin Karimloo’s existence. Yes, this really does need to be number one.
2. My family continues to be amazing. I feel like I should not be this big of a fan of my own family, but I am. Whatever. We’re awesome.
3. Working on my book! Going to the library, not hooking up to the internet, actually working. And I have decided that I will KEEP ON WRITING even when (inevitably) I hit the point when I realize that the book is stupid and worthless and no one would ever, ever want to read it. I mean, this is just the beginning, and who knows how long I can keep this up, but hopefully I’ll develop some will power? Hopefully?
4. SPRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING. THERE ARE FLOWERS. IT IS WARM. I AM SO HAPPY. It’s kind of sad how much influence the weather has on my mood. I was sitting in the library on the second floor looking out the big windows and the grass was so green I thought I was going to cry.
5. Grace/Rich OTP and their flawless, flawless scenes
6. Rereading A Song of Ice and Fire. I had forgotten how easy it is to fly through these books. SUPER READABLE.
7. DOCTOR WHO SOON SOON SOON
8. Parks and Rec continues to be flawless and the happiest show on television with beautiful OTP times and Ron Swanson being excellent and Amy Poehler being my hero and lots more people starting to watch it. If you aren’t watching this show, I have nothing to say to you. I feel towards you the way the entirety of Pawnee feels about people who don’t appreciate Lil Sebastian (speaking of which, I want a t-shirt. I don’t even wear t-shirts, but I would wear that one).
9. Freya Mavor’s face. How is she possible? I don’t understand. I still think that if they insist on casting a blonde girl for the new Buffy reboot (instead of going with my race!swap idea), they should cast her, regardless of the fact that she is British. I think she’s the only person at this point that I would forgive for not being SMG.
10. Persephone Magazine changing their layout so that I can ACTUALLY READ IT. This website is what Jezebel wishes it were. Except better.
11. Watching The X-Files for the first time and the mytharc actually showing up. I love worldbuilding!
12. I’m going to In the Heights this weekend! Yay! I don’t know any of the music, but I’m super excited, because I hear excellent things.
13. Riding in my truck with the windows down and singing Marina and the Diamonds songs on the top of my lungs
14. My family made beignets on Sunday. NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM.
15. The Being Human finale. This would be higher up the list except that it was a couple of weeks ago now. But still. Well played, Toby Whithouse. Well played.


Top TenNine Things That Suck at the Moment
1. The world is actually a mess. I can’t even address it—I get too overwhelmed. But I keep hearing Yeats in my head: “For the world’s more full of weeping than you can understand.”
2. Steve Moffat’s ridiculous sexism coming through in an actual episode. HAHAHA ELEVEN TELLING AMY TO PUT ON TROUSERS. Except that’s not funny at all, Moff. Don’t do this to me. Seriously—don’t.
3. My boss is ridiculous *eyeroll*
4. Allergies impending. I feel them coming on. The one downside of spring arriving.
5. I actually do fail at lj. I just get overwhelmed by thinking about catching up with my flist, and it’s easier to avoid. I apologize for being a very bad friend.
6. No idea what I’ll be writing for seasonal_spuffy. Haven’t been in a BtVS frame of mind for a while.
7. Community continues to fail at race so hard that it ruins episodes that HAVE MY FUTURE HUSBAND AS A GUEST STAR. Seriously, Dan Harmon. We need to have a word.
8. Gas is ridiculously expensive. *sigh*
9. I am not married to Ramin Karimloo.

Also, I need to tell you a story about how awesome my mama is. ( cut for length )

what am i going to write for seasonal_spuffy? am i even going to be able to write anything? i haven't written anything longer than, like, 500 words in forever, and i feel like i have completely lost all of my writing abilities. uuuuugh.

if i didn't have to be at work i would spend this day lay face-down on my bed moaning about how i never accomplish anything. which isn't even true, it's just what i feel like today. uuuuuugh.



i promise I'll be back to my regular chipper self soon--if all else fails i'll go home and watch clips of david mitchell ranting on youtube. this has been a whiny post. because what is lj but a place to be ludicrously self-indulgant, right?

So I want to write something for halfamoon, but I'm not sure what yet? I was kind of thinking of a crossover with awesome ladies, like Buffy and Veronica meeting in a post-apocolyptic world or something? I don't know.

But since I seem to have ZERO creative powers lately, throw some ideas at me. Crossovers would be awesome (I still miss choco_cherries), or a fandom you know I’m in but I haven’t written for, or a movie you’d like to see fic for or something. I want to see if something sticks, basically. And obviously it has to be lady-centric.

I’d really rather not get prompts for things I write a lot of (for instance, if you want me to write some Buffy, please make sure that the premise is startlingly original?), just because I’m trying to stretch myself. And I think it goes without saying that I won’t be writing all of them or maybe any of them at all, but hopefully some discussion will inspire me?

Anyways…thoughts? Anyone? Bueller?